𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐓𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐆𝐄

010

                       PRETTY FACE TEN
        MAGAZINES, MIRROR, CALORIES
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3:45 pm

WARNING: MENTIONS OF WEIGHT, THROWING UP, HARSH WORDS

Seungmin rushed to his room as soon as he stepped into the apartment ignoring his mother in the process. The blonde closed his door locking soon after. "ratings?!" He frustratedly pulls his hair and goes into his bathroom.

Over his bathroom's wall there were photos of models hung up on those walls. Beautiful male models, specific weight and horrible words on it as well. Seungmin look harshly takes off one of the posters he had hung up. His tears already slipping down his chin as he looked at the model on the photo.

"w-why can't I look like the them?! Why can't I just be beautiful naturally?!" The blonde cried out crumbing the poster in hand. He threw it and melt onto the ground, leaning against the wall behind him. "I-I d-don't look like him! I don't look like the models on the magazines!"

'If only life was easy for the unattractive' seungmin thought to himself as he cried.

Seungmin's pov

I felt myself having a panic attack. My breathing began to become uneven. It became harder to breathe, voices began to echo through my mind and things became to darken.

I stand shaking dragging my self and forcing myself to look into the mirror in front of him. Touching my face as the image of myself became more clear. My breaths began to shaken.

People don't know how I hurt, how I lived and how they treated me. I want to hurt them like they hurt me! Why can't I just do the same to them like they all  did to me?? I tried to become better and to seek revenge but now looking at myself I can't do it. I don't want to become the person who hurt me the most. No matter how much I put my mind into it, I can't bring myself to do the same to those who hurt me.

'It was only because I was ugly. Nothing else but because I was ugly.'

'Why should I pay for something I didn't get to choose!? I didn't chose to being born ugly, I was child yet the world was all against me.' I cried remembering all the horrible things I got done too.

"I-I have to control my weight. I c-can't let myself go not after w-what I had done to get h-here.." I stand from the ground again and kneel down towards the toilet sliding my fingers into my throat. Tears swell in my eyes, the burning sensation returned and letting out all what I have ate.

I slowly got up from the floor and wipe my mouth. I return to the sink, I began to brush my teeth and rinse my mouth. I put both hands onto the out frame of the sink..

103 Cal
98 Cal
7 Cal

End of Seungmin's pov

Seungmin walks out of the bathroom, he threw himself on the bed and closed his eyes. He gulped and sighed. The blonde became so tired that he had fallen asleep. Dried tears on his face, red flushed cheeks showing that the blonde had cried.

'Just a pretty face..'

"are you sure you're okay? You look off today.." says Felix who keeps stealing glances at the taller. Seungmin smiles at the other's words, at someone did notice his behavior even though he wouldn't admit what he felt. He finally had someone check on him. "Lix im okay I promise."