Promise » [cashton] √

5.2

[10th of April]

Calum

As they entered the study, Calum realised only Sierra had followed him inside, and both of them faltered for a moment, considering if they should remind the others to follow them. The realisation that Luke and Ashton were most likely having some sort of important conversation outside dawned on them both as they made eye contact and shifted uncomfortably.

Both drawn to opposite sides of the room, letting objects occupy them as they waited for the others to follow them in. Seeming to realise at the same time that they weren't coming, they turned, eyeing one another again.

"Two guesses what they're talking about," Sierra said after a moment, rolling her eyes.

"The weather?"

A snort, "is that what we should talk about?" she asked.

"Why? Were you planning on interrogating me, this a divide and conquer situation?"

A nod, "What are Ashton's intentions with you? Is he back in his right mind?" her voice playing at serious as she eyed him teasingly.

Calum laughed, "I think so," he shrugged.

"You've sorted yourselves out though?" more serious this time.

"Yeah," he agreed, "we had a long talk, a lot of long talks actually," and he had thought he was going to finish there but his mouth kept moving, "It was going to happen eventually- mean," he sighed, "that whole church is a nightmare, even if we'd been married or- I don't know it just-" he sighed again, every thought he'd had on that church, on how tortured Ashton seemed at times bubbling just below the surface but none leaving his lips.

"I- we- he's trying to find things to help, but I don't know how long it'll take before- before," he felt treacherous as his lips found the words, "how long before he feels less ashamed," Ashton was proud. Not like you'd expect from a celebrity, but proud nonetheless and somehow, despite everything, despite it being Sierra. It felt like a betrayal to admit that Ashton had shame. He was bulletproof, stood in front of crowds, interviewed like breathing, and the stumbling block was something that came so easily to the rest of them.

He felt the fear climbing the back of his throat again. The unspoken fear that Ashton would never feel okay about their relationship, that this was the beginning of the end, Walking on egg shells. Or worse, that Ashton would always be wracked with guilt, and he would never tell Calum, that he would suffer for love, because they were 'meant to be'.

He felt a hand on his arm, "he's got the best support in the world between all of us and his therapist; he'll always have someone to talk to," she assured.

"Yeah, but he has to want to talk,"

They were both quiet, listening to the hum of conversation on the other side of the wall. No specific words could be made out, but there was the comfort of life, just a room over that made their silence unconcerning.

Sierra drifted towards his desk, hand reaching out to move his mouse and waiting to see the screensaver appear. It was a photo from one of Ashton's shows, more crowd than stage, and it had no particular attribute that made it better than any of the others; he just liked it best.

"It's a nice setup," she said, running a hand along the edge of the monitor, "I thought Michael said he dented it on the door,"

Calum's cheeks heated, "Ah, yeah, Ashton insisted on replacing it," he told her sheepishly. She just laughed, though, both of them knowing it was typical Ashton behaviour, "don't tell Michael, he'll feel bad," 

The hum of conversation in the hall was drawing to a close, and they shared another look. Sierra led the charge out into the hall, where they found the others tangled in each other's arms, and Calum felt the relief that washed over both him and Sierra.

Both Ashton and Luke seemed to hear or sense them and parted, turning to look at them, "you not interested in seeing Cal's office Lu?"

"I could go in for a look," Luke shrugged, and he moved past them into the room, Calum turned following them, sensing Sierra had something she wanted to say to Ashton.

Once they were on the other side of the door, they both made to speak at the same time.

"I'm glad he has you,"

"It's good he has you,"

They paused momentarily, letting themselves turn the words over before laughing.

"So you're officially mistress of the house," Luke said quietly.

Calum turned, seeing the smirk on his face, "shut the fuck up," he laughed though, "you're just sad you'll never see my bachelor pad again,"

"Mmhmm, I loved your mouldy couch it gave me this gorgeous lightheaded feeling,"

They were laughing again, and Calum was relieved, part of him believing that his and Luke's fun friendship only existed outside of his relationship with Ashton. Before he could think of anything to say, Luke spoke, interrupting their laughter.

"Two guesses why Sierra corralled us in here,"

It only made Calum laugh harder.

"What? What's so funny?" Luke asked, voice desperately offended by being the butt of the joke.

Calum took a moment, steadying his laughter, "you just remind me of your wife,"

"What the fuck does that mean?" Luke asked, incredulous again, but Calum was still laughing to himself.

"You know, being mistress of the house means that I can take beer from the fridge whenever I want,"

"You already did that, I already do that," Luke said, rolling his eyes.

Calum rolled his eyes back, "This is my way of saying let's go get a beer, you idiot," and he shoved Luke gently toward the door.

"Oh, okay," he thought for a moment, "I didn't even look at your office,"

"Sierra clearly wanted to talk to Ashton, Jesus Christ, can see who the brains of the outfit is," Calum laughed again.

'"I don't like this, I preferred when you were trying to keep the peace and had to be nice to me," Luke complained, but was already leading the way out of the room.

Hey y'all! I'm kind of back. I've been unwell since October/November and am still not fully recovered (idk what it is). So I haven't had much energy to write. But I got a nice message from @clifford127 a few days ago and decided I should sit down and try and write something. I know it's not super long but it's something. I'm determined to finish this fic there's not much left. And I've been trying to write some other stuff when I get a chance too (lashton and Muke fics). I hope you enjoyed this and I hope anyone who's still out there is doing well ♥️