The Other Side of Our Hearts

Maybe I Made a Mistake

It wasn't completely out of the ordinary for arguments to occur. Some were minor and playful, but occasionally they became venomous an explosive.

That evenings fight between Kaveh and Alhaitham was one of those such dripping with venom.

The pair had been co-habiting for three years and only started moving more toward the early stages of a romantic relationship within the past six months. Initial hesitation to enter such a pairing always came as a result of their falling out in the Akademiya and numerous misunderstandings since they re-entered each others lived. But once they came on the same page it was more comfortable. Their fights were less in severity and easily resolvable.

But the fight they found themselves currently in seemed to lack any existence of those mutual feelings, as if it was their educational days all over again.

"We have been together for MONTHS Haitham! Why is it still so hard to actually get some kind of EMOTION out of you as if it was anything but?! Even just some small kind of affirmation that you care about me?!"

"You act like I'm some machine. Do you really have to make it sound like I'm cold and heartless? It's not something that comes easily to me and you should know that. Why is it such a big deal to voice what you already know?!"

"I don't know, maybe because a graduate of Haravatat should have the linguistic capacity to at least CONVEY something with any of those twenty languages you have to master to graduate?!"

Kaveh paced back and forth in the living room, his arms flailing or hugging his chest while their shouting match continued. Alhaitham remained seated on the divan, arms crossed over his chest and eyes closed. It was easy to see both men were dominated by anger in how tight their bodies were as the argument proceeded.

"So should I wear my heart on my sleeve like you Kaveh, and allow the world to tear it apart for mere morsels of praise?"

"Ohh no . . ." Kaveh halted in his tracks and turned toward the Scribe, hands on his hips and nails digging into his sides. "So we're resorting to cheap shots now?!"

"I am simply pointing out facts." Alhaitham rose to his feet and approached the architect. "We are creature of nature and our environments. My being flowery with my language is just as contradictory as your being capable of saying no to your clients or scams masking as charity."

"Well maybe if you actually grew up with people who were such you'd be capable of understanding what that is like. Maybe if your family showed you what caring for someone is like?!"

"Are you insinuating I am the way I am without my parents? At least I don't have to live with crippling guilt of losing a parent, which may I remind you CONSTANTLY was never your fault?"

"Don't . . ." Kaveh lowered his gaze, his left hand leaving his hip and balling into a tight fist. "Don't you dare go there . . .at least I had parents to lose . . ."

"Kaveh . . .you're entering dangerous territory . . ."

Silence fell between the two, neither unsure how to proceed the conversation from there. Like the reflections of their personalities were muddled in fog and haze, they were unable to see the mirrors before them that helped the two contrast each other beautifully. Kaveh moved to turn away from Alhaitham after the long pause and started walking away to give each other space.

"Maybe . . .maybe this was all dangerous." He sighed aloud as he tried to hold back the pang of sadness along with his face. "We can never not fight can we? And I can't ask or demand either of us change how we are, that isn't fair. Perhaps our fall out as students should have stayed as such . . .we wouldn't have kept hurting each other."