the love rectangle

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the bed feels so big without One in it. i sigh and stretch myself into a starfish position. after One left for the day, i went back to sleep. it is now early afternoon and i don't know what to do with myself. maybe i should have gone to work with him today. i know he was serious about wanting me there. everyone that matters knows about me so it won't necessarily be a surprise. i groan and kick my feet a little before rolling onto One's side of the bed and burying my face in his pillow.

i'm One's long term partner. we've been together a few years now and successfully kept my existence a secret from his fans. i'm the one who asked for that. when we first started seeing each other he was ready to introduce me to the world, but i don't want to be bothered and fans, particularly fans of bl actors, can get pushy. he had no clue what i meant when i told him that. he's not dumb or full of himself, he just inhabits an entirely different headspace from most of the rest of humanity. when i told him if people knew about me they would be following us around trying to get pictures of us kissing he was horrified. he settled for openly stating that he has a partner but refusing to specify who it is.

the speculations are never ending, of course, when he first mentioned having a partner, but the general consensus is that our best friend Four is One's partner. they were co stars in a few shows together, before Four chose to retire. One took a little break after Four exited the acting scene. despite being a seasoned actor, he was nervous about being paired with someone else. Four looked out for him a lot, in the beginning, and was instrumental in protecting him from the nastier aspects of the industry. the show that One is filming for today is his first one since choosing to make a comeback.

One's manager and agent have done an incredible job of protecting his - our - privacy. we have been living together for awhile now and the general public is none the wiser. i don't even think they know what part of the city we live in. they know about Four's book shop of course. keeping that a secret wouldn't have been good for business. whenever One and i go there, we arrive separately; we also don't hang out in the main store. Four has an apartment adjacent to the shop where we can unwind away from prying eyes.

i support One, of course, but from the wings. he's an excellent actor and watching him grow in his career has been incredible. i love helping him find solutions for connecting with people and helping him go over his lines in areas he struggles with. i love watching the finished product of his shows, although he forced me to agree to never watch them while he is in the house and if he is, i have to have headphones in. i just love him so, so, so much.

maybe i should have gone with him today.

i roll back to my side of the bed and reach for my phone to call Four.

Four: hello?

Three: heyo. it's Three.

Four: oh hey. what are you doing up? i thought you'd be sleeping in after last night.

Three: One woke me up when he was getting ready this morning, so i am up.

Four: you're not trying to go into work are you? do i need to talk you out of it?

Three: *laughs* no, no. nothing like that.

Four: then what is it?

Three: were you already awake? i didn't wake you up, did i?

Four: i mean, i'm up. i'm still laying in bed but i'm up.

Three: i've been laying in bed too. thinking about how today is One's first day on set since going back.

Four: same.

Three: he asked me to come with him this morning.

Four: did he? he hasn't done that in awhile.

Three: i know. i think he's nervous.

Four: i offered to go and he told me not to. the double standards of that man - absolutely infuriating.

Three: *chuckles* well....do you want to go?

Four: *dead silence*

Three: Four? hello?

Four: are you being serious??

Three: ....yes?

Four: you are going to go to a movie set.

Three: well, i mean, i was thinking about it.

Four: YOU are going to go to a MOVIE SET?!

Three: well when you put it like that....

Four: you are going to go to a movie set?!

Three: *groans* will you stop repeating yourself already? i get it. it's an unusual move on my part.

Four: it has to be love. there's no other reason for you to be acting like this.

Three: are you coming or not? because i'm going but i'm only going if you're going and until you say you're going i can't commit in my head to going.

Four: i'm in.

Three: *pumps fist* yesssss.

Four: i'll drive?

Three: nah, i'll drive. with any luck people will think i'm you're driver or something.

Four: you're actually ridiculous. you know that, right?

Three: *heading for his closet* or, i could wear a hoodie and pretend to be your body guard. sunglasses too.

Four: you know you can't hide forever, right? someone's going to find out or figure this out eventually.

Three: *sighs* i know. but i want to enjoy anonymity for as long as it lasts before that happens.

Four: fame isn't that bad.

Three: do you seriously want the tabloids fighting over which one of us deserves One more?

Four: *winces* oh God, no. please.

Three: that day will come and we will not be prepared, we'll just have to live with it. but for right now let me enjoy my illusion of freedom.

Four: fine, fine, i'll get off your back. just don't wear anything of his or yours that he's worn in public or you'll be making the reporter's jobs waaaaay too easy. i'm going to go shower. text me when you're on your way.