Pets

Not Ok (Gage)

Gage 

Charlie goes to the bathroom and grandma glares at me. "So that little girl was really pregnant with your baby? And you're sure it's yours?" She asks.

"Jesus Christ, yes. You can be pissed, and mean to me all you want just don't take it out on her." I hiss trying to be quiet so Charlie doesn't hear.

I'm so fucking tired. It's been almost 48 hours since I slept. I feel like I got hit by a fucking truck, and the way that guy punched it could be similar. However my bruises and marks are nothing compared to Charlie's. At least he didn't use the knife on her much. I thought for sure he was going to kill her. He probably would have if dad hadn't gone. I bury my face in my hands and try to block those thoughts out. I would have died too if he had killed her. I would have had nothing without her.

"You look like shit." My grandma says. Brutal, blunt, and mean as fuck like always grandma brings me back out of my thoughts.

"I know. It's been a rough weekend." I rub my hands over my face and then instantly regret it. My face is still swollen and bruised.

"What are you going to do with her now?" She asks, her voice cold like usual. I glared up at my grandma. What the fuck?

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Gage, how many 'girlfriends' have you kept around? This one might be the longest that I heard of. You don't like to actually have to deal with the girl. You just.." I interrupt her before she finishes. The last thing Charlie needs is to hear this shit.

"Grandma, this girl is different." She clearly doesn't believe me. "I love her, ok?" I get a suspicious look.

"We'll see. I'm only letting you stay because of the girl right now." I stand up and roll my eyes.

"I need to make sure Charlie is ok." I go check on her and get away from Grandma. Asking her if we could stay wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. It wasn't fun either, but no guns were involved so it was ok. I knock on the bathroom door.

"Hey are you ok? Do you need something?" I can hear her in there. There is a lot of sniffling. She must be crying again. Hearing her cry is harder then being hit in the face. It even hurts more.

"Is it ok if I take a shower? I need the clothes bag too." Charlie says in a soft voice. She is trying to sound like she is ok, but she's definitely crying again.

"Yeah, hang on. Are you sure you're ok?" I ask again. She says yes, not that I believe her. I go get our bag, and bring it to her. I open the door to walk in, but she stops me.

"Just hand it to me please." I do what she asks. There is something wrong. She won't tell me what it is.

"Charlie, please let me help you. What do you need?" I beg. I want to help. I need to do something. She doesn't answer. She just snatches the bag and closes the door on me. I can hear her get in the shower. How the fuck am I supposed to help when she won't let me?

I go to the room that used to be mine. It looks the same. Even has the shit on the walls I put there. I had a few friends that could paint and they graffitied a wall in my room for me. I forgot about that. There are a few well endowed girls, bikes, cars, and other fun stuff all over the wall. Charlie will love that.

I went back to check on her again. I knock on the door. All I can hear is the shower. She hasn't been in the shower long, but she won't answer me. I don't know if she can't hear me, or if she's ignoring me. I am going to make sure she's ok so I open the door. The bag the doctor gave her is lying next to the clothes bag tied up. I don't hear her moving in the shower.

"Charlie, are you ok?" I ask softly. I open the curtain just a little, and she's sitting in the tub with her head on her knees. Just letting very hot water run over her. I can see all the bruises around her stomach, back and sides. She doesn't move or answer me. I kneel down next to the tub. "Hey, are you ok?" She finally looks at me.

"I don't know." Her voice wavers when she answers. She lays her head back on her knees, but so she can see me. I rub her back and shoulders. "Do you want me to wash your hair?"

She gives me a tiny smile. "Yeah, you can." I don't think there could be a worse feeling than having to see your girl like this. It physically hurts my heart. What is worse is there is not one fucking thing I can do to fix it.

I grab her shampoo, conditioner, and her soap out of the bag. I set them on the tub. I put shampoo in my hand, and washed her hair for her. She tenses up when I hit certain spots. Then I remember him dragging her around by her hair.

"Are you hurting?" I ask making sure to be really gentle with her scalp as I wash.

"Just some cramping. The bruises, and stuff hurt, but not crazy bad. I just..." Her lip starts to tremble, and I watch as she tries to hold herself together. "I can't help it."

"I know, baby. I wish I could help more." I say. I hope she knows that I mean that. I want to help. She closes her eyes and sighs.

"You are doing a good job taking care of me." Yeah, I did a great job. Look where we are at. I got her hair rinsed out, and put conditioner in it. I know her hair routine now. I hand her the soap.

"Gage? If I was still pregnant, and I told you we were having a baby how would you have felt?" She asks looking at me with big tear filled eyes that are black and still swollen from getting smacked around. uh...I tensed up. That is not a question I was prepared for.

"I would be scared. Really fucking scared. I don't know anything about babies. I never thought of having any before. I didn't think about finding anyone I would want to have one with before you. I think if I had a kid I would be happy it was with you and not someone else." I was honest. I didn't realize just how much the thought of having a kid with her didn't make me want to run away screaming. It almost sounded like something I could have been happy about. If things had been different anyways. That made her smile.

"I would have been happy that it was yours. I know it would have been very scary. I have never even held a baby before. My brother and sister in-law were expecting a baby, but..." She doesn't finish. My poor Charlie, I hate that things are so shitty for her. They ruined her life. She started to curl into a tighter ball. Then she shoved me away, grabbed the curtain, and shut it on me.

"What the hell?" I didn't mean to yell, but she pushed me away out of nowhere.

"You need to...just give me a minute. Please go..." She sounds panicked, and I can tell she was hurting. Why the hell did she shut me out?

"What's wrong?" I ask starting to freak out. I don't know why she is hiding from me.

"Just fucking go Gage. I will be fine!" She screeches. Ok, she has passed panicked now. She is completely freaked out. Fuck, what the hell did I do? I get up and go out and slam the door. My Grandma is standing there looking at me. Great what the fuck does she want?

"Gage, she is probably bleeding and doesn't want you to freak you out." She states in her emotionless tone. I guess she heard us.

"Can I talk to her?" Grandma asks. I doubt Grandma will make Charlie feel better but maybe because they are both girls Charlie will talk to her. Fuck, I don't know. At this point I would do anything, or try anything to help her.

"You can try." I open the door, and tell Charlie my Grandma is coming in. Once she is in she pushes me away from the door shutting me out also. I felt useless, and I hated it. We are not ok, I can only hope that we will be eventually.