𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑮𝑰𝑹𝑳 | ᵍʳᵉʸˢ ᵃⁿᵃᵗᵒᵐʸ

⁰²³ 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧

𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄, 𝟐𝟎𝟎𝟓

On my first day at the new school, the clouds were just as cloudy and gray as the day I started first grade.

I was pissed. Really pissed.

Because my parents, Addison and Derek, had decided it was time to save the family, which for Mom and me meant staying in Seattle.

The city that wasn't New York. The place my father-Derek-had originally chosen to start his new life. Without me.

Since Dad's trailer in the woods had about as much room as a sardine can, Mom and I temporarily stayed in a hotel downtown, which I was anything but sad about.

To be honest, the thought of living under the same roof as my father made me toss and turn every night anyway.

But there I was, flanked by my parents, staring at the school building, a colossus of concrete and glass, as if I could bring it down with sheer willpower.

"I'm not going in there," I declared stubbornly, crossing my arms over my chest to demonstrate my resolve.

My parents exchanged one of those looks parents have when trying to telepathically figure out how to deal with their stubborn child.

They both knew about my struggle with dyslexia and the bullying I had experienced in elementary school. But we never talked about it. It was as if talking about it would bring up the old ghosts.

"Missy, please," Dad began in his soft, soothing voice, which only irritated me more at that moment. "We've talked about this. It's a new beginning for all of us."

"This isn't a fresh start. It's exile," I hissed.

"I don't want that, is that so hard to understand?
I want to go back to New York, to my old life, where I'm not the new freak show exhibit!"

Mom sighed, a sound that told me how tired she was of all of this. "Missy, sweetie, please give it a shot. For us."

"Hmm...let me think..."

I let my bag slip theatrically from my shoulder before picking it up again. "No!"

"Missy, enough drama," Dad said sternly, his patience wearing thin. "You're going in there now. Your mother and I don't have all day to stand here and discuss something that is non-negotiable."

I looked from one to the other, feeling the panic rise within me and knowing at the same time that I had no choice. Resigned, I shook my head, tears burning in my eyes.

"I hate you," I whispered, my voice breaking slightly, and I hated myself for it.

With one last venomous look, I turned and marched up the steps into the school building, my heart pounding with anger and despair.

I wanted to scream, to cry, to smash something. Instead, I swallowed my tears and walked on, step by step, into this new chapter of my life that I hadn't chosen.