𝑺𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑮𝑰𝑹𝑳 | ᵍʳᵉʸˢ ᵃⁿᵃᵗᵒᵐʸ

⁰¹⁸ 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐫

Determined, I marched through the halls of Seattle Grace Hospital, every fiber of my body tensed, ready to confront my father about why I always had to be the last link in our family's chain of communication.

I finally found him alone in one of the empty patient rooms, staring at a point somewhere far beyond the bare walls.

His posture spoke volumes about the day he had endured. He was obviously lost in thought, probably about one of those cases that break even the best doctors' hearts.

Suddenly my anger felt ridiculously petty, almost trivial compared to the weight he was obviously carrying.

In that moment, he wasn't just the doctor or the father I felt had misbehaved too often lately, but just a human being who was visibly suffering.

I hesitated, wanting to turn around and leave before he noticed me.

But in doing so, I accidentally bumped into a resident whose arms full of files fell to the floor.

I groaned silently. Excellent timing, Missy.

Derek looked up, his blue eyes clear and piercing, though streaked with red veins.

"Missy, what are you doing here? Is everything all right?" he asked immediately, putting aside his own worries, ready to step into the role of caring father.

"Uh, I..." I started, unable to decide whether to stick to my plan or just disappear.

But then I had an idea how to use the situation to my advantage. "I need a fentanyl patch from the in-house pharmacy. Because of the scoliosis, you know."

"Fentanyl?" Derek's eyes widened, and I felt his concern immediately turn to red alert. "Who prescribed you fentanyl?"

"Dr. Jeffrey in New York," I replied, a little too defensively as I inwardly wondered about my own lie. I had been treated by Dr. Jeffrey, but fentanyl had never been part of the program.

I could practically see Dad flinch at that name.
He never liked Dr. Jeffrey, I knew.

"Why would Dr. Jeffrey prescribe something so strong? It's a very dangerous medication, Missy."

"Oh, I don't know. He said it was best at relieving the pain," I said indifferently, playing the innocent child blindly following the doctor's orders.

Derek shook his head. "No, something's wrong. I want to take another look at your scoliosis myself, Missy. We'll take new x-rays and review everything. If you're really in that much pain, we'll find an appropriate treatment. But fentanyl is not an option."

The idea of my father examining me made me flinch inwardly, but at the same time I knew I didn't have much room to maneuver without exposing my lie.

So I nodded reluctantly, though part of me was annoyed that I couldn't just get what I wanted.

"All right, but it has to be today. I can't walk around with this pain anymore," I said, not quite hiding my disappointment.

Derek nodded seriously and for a brief moment I saw the man I knew and loved before all the complications started. "Of course, Missy. Let's get you to X-ray right away."

As we walked to the elevator, I felt strangely disarmed and exposed, as if he could see through my little lies.

But deep down, I knew I was kind of glad that he could. Maybe that was what I needed all along - someone who could look deep enough to see the truth behind the excuses.