hey! what hell is your problem.
you are sometimes so nice,
sometimes hell is gone rouge with you.
you text me out of nowhere.
then push me away like i don't exist.
you say you love me.
but is it how love supposed to feel.
i don't understand what's wrong,
is it me?
am i not worthy?
or is there something i am missing.
i can't take it anymore.
you don't communicate.
you don't talk,
you make feel all the emotions at once.
you have no clue all the butterflies have died now,
all my soul is dried off.
tell me what you want,
i will do everything for you.
anything, anyway i could be.
but i don't want it like this anymore.
i don't wish to be this....
i wish...
i wish to be loved.
i wish to be in a normal relationship.
i wish to be happy..
i wish....
i wish....
.
i looked into her eyes,
passion and hope,
making them shine.
i want to say things,
i wanted to explain her everything.
i wish i had love left for her.
how sometimes i just want to be around her.
how sometimes i feel warm with her.
words have died,
but my eyes are cold.
not because i didn't healed.
but because there noone to be seen.
i am cemetery of dead hopes.
i am grave of my past self.
i don't want to feel loved anymore,
i don't want to be worried that you'll leave me.
you know once i had a cat,
her name,
miss smitten.
cause as silly as it sound,
i was just smitten by her.
i loved her dearly,
studied with her resting in my lap,
painted all her shades.
i told her everything.
everything, from my childhood.
to dreams of what i wanna be.
i told her my secrets.
hoping for her to keep.
one day i couldn't find miss smitten.
i ran and ran,
ran out breath,
out of place and everywhere.
until i found her head,
lying in blood.
some speedy driver ran over her.
miss smitten was never to be found.
she left all on her own.
with my secrets
and my hopes.
dreams,
and destitution of reality.
now,
you are my miss smitten.
it better to let you go.
then to lose you.
i let out a sigh.
"say something now" she yelled.
"nothing, do what you like."
i replied.
i wish only i could tell her.
i wish she knew.
i wish....
i wish......
