WAITING FOR NEVER

CHAPTER 6

Feeling the weight of her actions dragging her through the mud, Gia woke up feeling like a worthless person. She had sworn to herself that she'd get over him and what does she do when he shows up? She melts like butter .

Hate is too little to describe what she felt for herself. She lay quietly in bed replaying everything in her head .

How could she love and hate him at same time ? And why wouldn't he just leave her alone ? If only he had stayed away, then maybe she could have healed.

She didn't need to turn around to know that he had left. She could feel it. And in the comfort of that knowledge, she clutched her sheet and "screamed" till her throat begun to hurt.

She felt this bitter pang in her heart and she felt like she was on fire . Everything hurt. Her heart felt broken, her mind went blank and she felt sore all over .

Pulling herself into an embrace, she 'sobbed'. This was a different kind of pain which she wasn't prepared to deal with.

This wasn't the first time, it wasn't even the 20th time . And she was well aware of it , but somehow, it hurt her more than those other times, and it's not because he left, it's because he came back and brushed everything off like it wasn't a big deal. And she allowed him to .

She could feel knots in her stomach as she lay there drowning in tears. Even breathing had become a nearly impossible task . It's like she was trapped in a world of never ending Sadness.

She wanted to end all this . She needed to . The pain was unbearable. It wasn't just physical pain, it was mental, emotional, even spiritual. She chose to end it all. She rushed to her bathroom and opened the cabinet. She fished through her first aid kit for a pair of scissors.

When she found it , she tossed the kit aside and held the scissors with both hands and aimed the sharp part at her belly. She took one last look in the mirror.

The sight before her disgusted her . She was reduced to nothing. She didn't even look like herself anymore . It broke her just as much . All she could do was scream . She raised the scissors but she couldn't bring herself to do it .
Instead, she stabbed her mirror with it and let out a terrifying shriek.

Bits of glass pieces bit into her flesh and her hand started to bleed , but that wasn't the cause of her shriek. It was because she could feel herself go crazy.

Carlos had left to go get them breakfast and buy Gia an outfit because he had planned to take her out . He was just outside when he heard the sound of 'shattering ' glass and Gia's screams .
With strength and speed he didn't even know he possesed , he dashed into the room like an angry bull. Had it been in a normal situation, he would have been in pain from the contact shoulder made with the door. But with Gia in possible danger, he didn't feel anything.

He got there just in time . Gia had almost stabbed herself, but Carlos' interruption startled her and she dropped the scissors.

They stood there looking at each other for a while . Gia with no expression in her eyes , she looked lifeless. Her beautiful eyes which held so many sapphires, now looked like cold stone.
Carlos had a look of fear and confusion in his eyes.

Gia broke the eye contact and picked up the scissors again. She was determined to finish what she had started . Carlos tried to get close to her .

"DONT!"

She shouted. Filled with guilt and fear, Carlos raised his hands to show that he meant no harm . It was in fact, at this point he felt the severity of this issue.

If he made any movements, she might stab herself, and if he just stood there , she would definitely stab herself. He felt like there was no safe way out of this .

He felt frustrated with himself for not being able to come up with a reasonable solution. He felt completely helpless.

Then , he spoke. He was truly afraid, but he tried to mask it . He couldn't be vulnerable now, being vulnerable might cost him Gia's life .

"Gia , listen to me . You're, well Gia you're better than this . It doesn't need to end like this . Please don't do this . Let's fix it ."

He didn't think it would work, but what he had said bought him some time . Gia loosened her grip on the scissors for a brief moment , then she aimed it at her belly again as she spoke.

"FIX IT? LOOK AT ME ! CARLOS, TAKE A GOOD LOOK AT ME! I'M REDUCED TO NOTHING. THIS ? CARLOS THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT . THERE IS NO FIXING! I'M BROKEN, I'M A MESS . THIS IS WHAT YOU TURNED ME INTO , AND ALL I , ALL I EVER DID WAS TO LOVE!"

Seeing her like this broke something in him . He knew leaving her behind was a mistake and it probably messed her up , but it couldn't be just that.

Was it perhaps all the times he hurt her ? Was she bottling them up? Did they add up to this ? He was at a loss.
Whatever it was , it wasn't because of their recent separation. It was then he recalled that one time she told him that he had drained everything out of her and that she might actually lose her mind with his actions .

He was so guilt ridden that he didn't even feel the tears he had been holding back drop down his cheeks. He begged her and told her he loved her.

"Ha ha. You don't love me Carlos. YOU DON'T SUCK THE SOUL OUT OF PEOPLE YOU SAY YOU LOVE . DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH THIS HURTS? I DON'T WANT TO HURT ANYMORE! DO YOU GET ME ? DO YOU! If you truly love me , let me go ".

With that , she raised the scissors. But , by then it was too late , their little conversation gave Carlos all the time he needed to stop her . Before she could bring her hand down , Carlos had held on to the blade part of the scissors. It left a cut in his palm , but he didn't care. He didn't even feel the pain. He got possession of the scissors and he tossed it aside .

"JUST LET ME DIE!"

Gia screamed while angrily hitting Carlos in his chest. He just stood and allowed her to hit him . He felt like he deserved it. When she stopped hitting him , he simply wrapped his strong arms around her and allowed her to cry her heart out .

END OF CHAPTER 6 . HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT .

PARDON ME FOR ANY ERRORS

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STAY TUNED FOR CHAPTER 7