Arranged: Betrothed

chapter 35

I needed time to heal. I had learnt relationships take time, effort and lots of communication. I think that was the biggest mistake from my part. I never communicated my thoughts, worries or any issues that I had with him. Maybe I was overreacting, but at the same time my feelings are justified. I have no one else except him. And even if there was anyone else in my life I could turn to, I still wouldn't just leave my marriage over something like this.

I only had Mary to consult with and her parents had overheard and I guess they felt obligated to have a conversation like that with me. And I was grateful, they were honest with me and advised me to remain calm, as any decisions made in anger only lead to regret.

Today was the day and I was nervous to go back. Would he accept be after I rejected him? It was worth a try.

I hadn't even spoken to Juliet since the last argument and at first she tried to speak to me, but I ignored her. After that she would look at me, but keep her distance. Good. I trusted her too. Now my only aim was to study as hard as I could and get through university. Christmas holidays were around the corner which means deadlines were coming fast. I didn't have time to waste on anything else.

I had packed my bag already the night before, but I didn't want to carry the load with me, so I left it at Marys house. I am hoping to collect it when Samir and I reconcile. I went about my day until it was time to go home. Truthfully I was putting off going home to him because I didn't know what his reaction could be. He could just deny me and say he wanted to nothing to do with me.

I hid in the library trying to focus on my work and complete some of my assignments, but my mind was a mess. I couldn't think about anything apart from Samir and how to approach him. Eventually I gave up. I packed my pen and notebooks and logged out of the computer and made my way out.

It was cold outside and dark. I need a new coat or jacket for this weather, my hoodies weren't going to help much anymore. My bus came after a few minutes of waiting and I sat down at the back of the bus and tried to hold the conversation in my head.

'I'm sorry for everything.' No, I have to be firm because I had already apologised for being wrong.

'Can I come in?' No, I'm not asking him anything, it wont sound firm.

'I'm here to talk.' I'm so dumb.

I will go with the flow. I doubt Ill be able to get any words out of my mouth at that time, considering I was already shaking and my heart was beating erratically. My stop was coming up so pressed the button and walked to the door. As soon as the driver stopped the door opened. "Thanks driver,"

I hopped out and walked fast to heat myself up a little. My nose was getting cold and so were my hands. I reached his house in no time. The lights were off. Maybe he had gone to sleep. It was only 9pm, was that late? We used to be in bed around 10pm and cuddled until we both fell asleep. My stomach fluttered as I remembered our nights together. I missed him.

I walked up the driveway and waited in front of the door. I hesitated. I was nervous. I took a short shaky breath and raised my hand, pressing down on the doorbell.

The wait for him to open the door was worse than the whole ride to his house. I heard some shuffling behind the door before the lock turned and the door slowly opened to reveal him. I held my breath as he didn't really look at me. His eyes travelled up from my shoes looking confused until he looked at my face. His eyes widened. I opened my mouth to speak. I was suddenly engulfed in a tight embrace, knocking all the air out of me, making me forget what I was going to say. His head nuzzled into my neck, taking a deep breath. I wrapped my arms around his neck, returning his hug with the same fierceness as him.

He lifted me up and I squeaked with shock. He placed his hands on my bottom, holding me up against himself and walked back into his house, kicking the door shut and locking it.

He trudged upstairs and then slammed his bedroom door shut too. I felt nervous and unsure when he let me down. Only because he brought me up right into his room. My throat tightened and I gulped nervously.

His arms stayed around me as he stared at me, in somewhat disbelief that I was here. I was more shocked when he let me come in without a question. I expected there to be another argument, if that then another discussion about last time. I thought he might feel a little bit like I disrespected him by refusing his order. But there was nothing like that on his face, his eyes held tenderness for me.

I relaxed in his embrace, taking a deep breath and letting it out. Samir wasn't like the way he had acted a few days ago. He had always been gentle and caring, but I had built up a different image of him in my head about him. I opened my mouth to speak, but he quickly brought his finger up to my mouth, shushing me. I shut my mouth right away, gladly because I wasn't really sure what to say. He pushed the bag off my shoulders, letting it drop on the floor and then same with my hoodie. He slowly unzipped, pushing the material off and seeing my bare shoulders. His eyes narrowed at me. I looked down embarrassed. Its not like I took my hoodie off during the day. I shivered slightly, the tank top did little to keep me warm. He bent down in front of me and pulled my laces apart, lifting my foot and pulling the shoes off and then my socks too.

He stood back up, lifting me up again and carrying me to his bed. He laid us down side-by-side, reaching for the blanket and wrapping it around us tightly. I was warming up quickly in more ways than one. He reached for the hem of his shirt and tugged it off, throwing it on the floor before reaching for me again and wrapping me into his arms as much as he could. He intertwined our legs, pushed his hands under my tank top and held me. I knew then that no words were needed. We both understood what we had done wrong and that we didn't need to talk about it more. He sighed peacefully with his eyes closed. I did the same and pressed my face into his chest. We both fell asleep quickly after that.

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Well well well. guess who decided to post quickly. Maybe some of you guessed, but this book is coming to an end. Sorry if you expected it to be longer. Don't worry there will be smut soon. Cant be leaving that out. LOL

Hope you enjoyed that.

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Z.A.B