Treacherous (Emily Prentiss x Reader)

Chapter 20

a/n 

hey everyone!!! 

its been a while but at least for the next couple of chapters i'll be updating semi regularly.

i don't know how i feel about the writing in this but it's the first one in a while so it should pick up i hope :)

bit of a shorter one but all the confusion will be revealed soon!

slight c/w for mental illness and ED undertones (literally one line)

all my love <3

28th September 2019

y/n pov

A few weeks had gone by and Emily and I had been keeping to a similar routine; cases were spent almost entirely together, sharing hotel rooms under the guise of budgeting, and time off spent on dates in and out of our apartments. The more and more time I spent with her the more I could feel myself falling. Everything about her was so perfect to me, and the longer we spent together, the more I craved her in every way.

However, in my state of bliss the looming presence of darkness doesn't go unnoticed.

As the date that has loomed in my periphery for the last year begins to edge closer, the signs of my collapse rear their ugly head. I couldn't let that happen. I had grown so much in the last year I couldn't go back, not with so much to lose. Not with Emily to lose.

The only one who knew the specifics of the end of my last relationship was Tara, which was a harsh reminder as the days came and went, getting closer to the anniversary of the end. She watched me with more concern as usual as I could feel my front shut down.

Feigned smiles and optimism clouded any interaction hinting at being alright, but the overcompensating along with the flood of memories and déjà vu was exhausting I had resorted to avoiding meet-ups outside of work, and when I saw Emily I'd spend the time quiet in the apartment often falling asleep infront of the tv whilst Emily held me, only to be struck with insomnia when I'd wake in the early hours of the morning. I hope she's not worried I'm sure it'll be fine.

It was now the early hours of the 28th, the day I had been worriedly anticipating for the last week, and I lay staring at the clock on my wall as Emily slept soundly, her head resting on my chest. 4:16am...

I heard Emily's phone go off beside me as I reached over to check if it was urgent, and lo and behold it was another case. Great. I gently woke the sleeping woman up feeling her arms tighten around me as a groan escaped her lips, 'Case?' She groggily asked me, eyes still shut.

'Yep, case.' I answered shortly. Emily moved to get up, planting a kiss on my forehead as she made her way to my bathroom to shower and get ready. I lay in the bed gathering myself until Emily was done, then wordlessly taking her place in the bathroom. I'm so tired.

As I looked in the mirror the person looked back at me gave a shocking resemblance to the me a year ago staring into the mirror. It's like nothing has changed. The weeks lack of sleep had seemingly crept up on me, massive bags forming under my eyes.

Fighting the exhaustion I brushed my teeth, chucking my hair into a claw clip and throwing some work appropriate clothes on, deciding on a white shirt and black trousers. I slid on some loafers and left the room, finding Emily in the kitchen working on breakfast for us both.

'I called the rest of the team my love,' she said turning to me as she heard my footsteps. I felt a slight flurry of emotion at the name as I mustered a small smile at her.