old fashioned • dj&ts

xxii. braids and beach sandwiches

"I want you to sing with me at the Chicago show."

Alexis almost choked on her food when Daisy sat with her and spoke without skipping a beat. They were on the band's jet, on their way to the next show.

"No, I can't do that."

"Come on, you've done it before," Daisy begged.

"No, I haven't. The only time I've even stepped on the stage is when I was coked out and dragged against my will," Alexis fought. "You're the only one who has ever heard me sing, I'd like to keep it that way."

"Billy already agreed to let me bring you and Simone out for the show," Daisy smiled. "Please, it would mean so much to me."

"No, Daisy. You know I'd do anything for you, but I can't do this."

"Then you wouldn't do anything for me," Daisy told her. Alexis sighed, putting her fork down. "Let Me Down Easy. That's what I want us to sing. Think about it."

"What was that about?" Eddie asked, taking Daisy's seat once she walked away.

"Daisy asked me to sing for her once and now she wants me to sing with her in Chicago," Alexis admitted. She promised herself she would let him in, and this is something she's been hiding for a long time. "Singing is something I do for myself, not for a stadium full of people."

"Daisy wouldn't ask you to sing with her if she didn't think you were great," Eddie told her, holding her hand. "You know I'd love for you to be out there with me. The rest of the band would, too, no question."

"Eddie-"

"I really think you should do it, Alexis," Eddie continued. "You're being given a shot only a handful of people get in their lifetime. Take it."

Alexis was given a speech by every single band member, including Billy, when word got around that she was invited to sing with the band in Chicago. Everybody encouraged her and talked about the memories they'd make with her, but Chicago was honestly the last thing on her mind because the band was on their way to Pittsburgh.

"It's going to be okay," Eddie whispered, sitting across from her again. She had zoned out, watching the world pass by them as they got closer and closer to the city she swore she'd never return to. "My family is waiting to meet you."

Alexis looked at him and he noticed her eyes were glossy. She was happy to meet his family, but they weren't her family. Not really. She'd be going to a party where nobody knew her. At least she wouldn't be alone, Daisy wasn't from Pittsburgh. The only people they knew were the rest of the band.

"Do you ever think about starting your own family?" Eddie asked quietly. Alexis nodded. "I do, too. I'd have a boy and a girl. I'd raise them in a house by the beach where I can teach them how to surf and ride bikes. I'd teach them how to play guitar, too, if they want."

"It doesn't scare you?" Alexis asked.

"No," Eddie smiled. "Because you're there with me, braiding hair and packing those little beach sandwiches you always used to make for us. And we're happy."

I tear escaped her eye, but it wasn't because she was sad. Imagining that kind of life, for the first time, gave her hope.

"I can imagine showing them pictures of us on tour and telling them how we met, exactly like I told you," Eddie continued. Alexis laughed. "It's not so bad to think about, is it?"

"No, it's not."

"We're here!" Graham cheered. Eddie put his sunglasses on before taking Alexis's off of her shirt collar and putting them on her face. He nearly poked her in the eye a few times, but it was just another thing for them to laugh about. He held her hand as they walked down the stairs and onto the platform, and grinned when he saw his family.

"Grandma!" He yelled, taking Alexis over to them. He let go of Alexis's hand to hug them, but was quick to introduce her. "This is Alexis."

"Oh, how beautiful," his grandma smiled, cupping Alexis's face in her hands before hugging her. It made Alexis feel warm. "I've heard so many things about you, dear, I feel like I've known you for ages. It's wonderful to finally put a face to the name."

"Eddie talks about you all the time," Alexis responded. "I'm really happy to meet you."

"This is my mom," Eddie interrupted, letting them talk while he stepped aside to talk to his grandmother.

"Do you have it?" He asked quietly.

"Of course I do. I'm old, but I haven't lost my mind yet," his grandma laughed, pulling a small box out of her purse. He quickly took it and slipped it in his pocket. "When do you think you'll ask the big question?"

"I don't know," Eddie said honestly. "But I know I'm going to."

Alexis turned and saw Eddie's grandma squeezing his cheeks and she laughed. "You two look very happy," his mom told her.

"Ready to go?" Eddie asked, slinging his arm around Alexis. "We'll see at the house, mom."

"I love them," Alexis smiled, looking up at him. He kissed the side of her head. "You were right."

Camila helped Billy's and Graham's mom throw a welcome home party for the band, so that's where they spent the day. The band was driven separately but met up with their families again, as well as a lot of old friends, at the Dunnes'.

"Eddie, you need to stop talking about The Ramones," Alexis laughed as Eddie ranted to her for probably the tenth time that week.

"I just think the world is changing and we're all screwed," Eddie shrugged.

"Hey, guys," Camila smiled, her hands clasped together in front of her as she walked up to them. "It's really good to see you."

"Yeah," Eddie smiled. "You, too."

"Can I talk to you?" Camila asked, looking at Alexis. Eddie pressed his hand against her back to encourage her to go, so she did. They went inside and into a room where they could be alone. Camila poured them drinks, figuring they might need them. "How have you been?"

"We don't need to do all that," Alexis told her, surprisingly calm. "If there's something you want to say, I'll listen."

"I know I already apologized and I know you can't forgive me," Camila started. "But I want you to know how much I regret what I did and how happy I am that you could forgive Eddie. None of it was his fault. He loves you so much."

"Look, I understand wanting to feel loved and wanting to hurt the people who hurt you," Alexis said quietly. "That doesn't make what you did to me okay, but you acknowledged what you did wrong and you apologized; that's more than a lot of people would do. I can forgive you and be civil, but I can't forget that it happened. I'll never be able to trust you the way I used to again."

"I can live with that," Camila nodded. "Thank you. You two are going to live a beautiful life together. You deserve it."

"I know I do," Alexis nodded, finally acknowledging her worth. Finally accepting that she that she deserves to be loved for who she is and not who people want her to be. Trying to change instead of accepting her flaws is what made everything burst into flames, and she wasn't going to do that again.