Right love, wrong time

Chapter 5: The past.

Lisa

Today was my first day at my new job. I have been struggling to get work. I needed to get back on my feet. I had to start all over again. I was scared and terrified. I didn't even know where to start. I had my degree, but I did not want to go back into the corporate world again. To many awful memories. I needed to start new, no I wanted to start anew. Luckily my friend knew someone, and by friend, I meant my father, he arranged this job for me. He knows the CEO of Kingston publishing, they needed a receptionist, so here I am. I still wanted to do it the right way. So, I handed in my cv, went for the interview, and then get the job. I didn't want the CEO to know that it was my father who asked for the favor, so I made my dad promise me not to say anything.

The doctor strongly advised against sitting at home and doing nothing, and besides doing nothing ain't gonna pay the bills. He said Ill need the distraction, otherwise I will fall back into old habits. And by old habits, I mean depression. I have been struggling with depression since I finished school. Seeing doctors and getting treatment was part of my life. But after my suicide attempt, my father decided it was enough. So, here I am starting a new job, trying to get my life together again, the same life I ruined.

No one really knows how debilitating depression is. I slept for weeks. Didn't bath, brush my teeth, or comb my hair. It was just too much work. My body felt weak. I got irritated just by the ringing of my phone. I didn't want to talk to anyone. I didn't want to acknowledge that I have failed, failed myself, my colleagues, my boss, my friends, and my family. I blamed myself. If only I saw the signs. If only I walked away sooner. I should have known better. But all I could see was my own failures and my own hurt. I knew I needed help, but I let my pride get in the way of me asking for it.

My phycologist suggested a new start at a new company. I must say even though I'm nervous as hell, I'm also excited. I love reading, its like living a thousand lives in one. This is one of the biggest publishing companies in the city, and even though I don't have my degree in anything that has to do with publishing the boss still hired me. Mr Harry Kingston, the CEO of Kingston publishing. Everywhere he goes he demands respect. He is dominating and intimidating at the same time. He always looks so arrogant. Doesn't smile or greet people, as if he is above them. Ugg, its gonna take all my restraints to keep my mouth shut.

I remember the day I met him. He was dressed in a 3-piece navy blue suit, with a white button up shirt, navy tie and silver cufflinks, black leather shoes and belt. And O my god did he look hot. In that moment I prayed to get the job, even if it was just to stare at the hot, sexy boss each day. I felt so out of place. I never worked well with stuck up people. I'm a down to earth, what you see is what you get type of gal and I like down to earth people. I won't say easy to work with as I am known to speak my peace and step on peoples toes. But I really needed this job, so for now, I would have to keep my mouth shut.

I will be working as Mr Kingston's receptionist. Making appointments, bring him coffee, you know the drill. Why he hired me I would never know, from the first glance anyone can see I don't fit in. But there was something about him, something I couldn't explain. Something that drew me to him. As if my body and his were talking a language on its own. My throat got dry, my palms became sweaty, I felt like I was burning up as if my body was acting on its own accord. What was wrong with me? Does he feel it to? Don't be silly Lisa, why would he feel something as silly as this. You are seriously losing your mind, I talked to myself, yes, like a crazy person. Hopefully he didn't notice the whole debacle.