My struggles began in elementary school when i was seven. 2nd grade to be exact. I hated it with my every being. Why? Because one day, i was miding my own business in the lunch room and these girls came up to me and were like, "hey, come sit with us, you're pretty cool". Against my better judgement, i sat with them with no hesitation, because i didn't have any friends, so i thought their words were sincere. I was wrong. We're eating and talking, but i remained quiet. Suddenly, one of the girls asked me to fill up their water bottle. Being the nice person that I am, i did, and when i came back, the girls, they're trays, and other stuff of theirs were gone. At the time, I didn't realize that they were fake as hell. But it gets worse from there. My teacher was even worse. She was mean to me and the other special education student. But it was mostly me. I felt as if i was the main target. One day, I was sitting in class one day and I had zoned out, but not on purpose. At the time, I didn't know what it was called. The teacher was talking about a compare and contrast chart we had to fill out and when i raised my hand to ask a question i didn't know the teacher went over, she would have the whole class remind me. they would literally yell the answer at me and I would say, "okay, okay, you don't have to yell at me". My teacher responded with, "well maybe if you were paying attention we wouldn't have to remind you". I said nothing afterwards, in fear that i'd get in more trouble. She'd also get in my face and say, "kay, this is what we just went over, you chose not to listen, so now you owe me five minutes of recess". Frankly, I didn't intentionally zone out, it just randomly happened and frankly i never knew why. She would do that very same thing if I didn't follow directions. but again, i unintentionally zoned out. it wasn't my fucking fault. I felt like she hated me and one day i asked her if she does, and she said no. i didn't say anything after. 3rd grade wasn't AS bad, but i still hated it nonetheless. The students knew i was a loner, so they took advantage of it by calling me "Sofia the first" the stupid princess from fucking disney jr. No matter how many times i told them to stop, they wouldn't. they even sang the damn theme song just to piss me off even more. they also looked over my shoulder at what i was doing, and would tattle on me to the teacher and i would always get in trouble. sometimes i would try to hide in my locker to avoid my teacher and classmates. My crush in third grade was mean to me and he got the other boys to fucking gang up on me. i hated it. fourth grade, i had a teacher, mr. murphy, who was an absoulute obnoxious dick-head. he always sided with the other students and basically teased me. the other students took advantage of that by blaming me for things i didn't do or never even did or haven't done. Every time i tried to explain myself, no matter what the hell i said, mr. murphy always sided with the students and barely even ackowledged my problems. i was sent to the office a lot, got my stick moved to the yellow cup, which is a discipline method if students are goofing off, or misbehaving. and I was given a lot of think sheets, which you're given if you're misbehaving and you write out what you did, then the teacher fills out what you did, then you take them home to get them signed by a parent and bring it back to the teacher the next day. I got seven of those. Fifth grade was the fucking worst. There was this bitch in my class named Kay. She always looked over my shoulder and ratted me out and teased me. one day on the day of our class's halloween party, as i was putting on my witch costume which was a lilac colored flowy dress that came with the pointy hat, Kay says to me, "Sophie, you look like a fat old lady". At that moment, I looked to my best friend, Cody to stick up for me, but instead, he just stood there like a bystander instead of an upstander. I was mad because of it. When I told my teacher, ms. Hau, she just told me to ignore her. but really no matter how hard i tried to ignore her, I just couldn't. she did anything possible to tease me and be an asshole. even worse, is whenever i would raise my hand to point something out, my stupid classmates would say "We don't care" "we didn't ask" "that's not what we're talking about". I was so pissed off i stormed out and said, "i wish you were dead". i was sent to the principals office for the rest of the fucking day, given a think sheet, a call home, and my chromebook privlages taken away. I hated my class for it. Everyone in my class was just so obnoxious and I hated it. they took advantage of how fucking nice i am. They always told me that it was cute whenever I got mad. I hated everyone in my fucking grade. even my own sister. Only because she would act differently around a popular group of girls and would be a fucking jerk. At home, she would apologize to me, only to do it again the next day. Truthfully, I can officially say that my damned elementary school expirience sucked. I was truly miserable and i hated every damn moment of it. I'll never forget. The bus rides to and from school every year were traumatizing because every kid was like, "can i play on your tablet?" or they would look over my shoulder and if i was journaling, they'd tell the bus driver on me for what i wrote. Even if i were eating on the bus, the kids would be swarming me asking for food. And whenever i was reading on the bus, I couldn't even focus without the high-schoolers in the back being loud as hell and swearing, especially in front of the little kids. Frankly nobody respected my boundaries whatsoever and were really annoying. I didn't say anything to the bus driver only because i didn't wanna be a tattle-tale or a snitch.
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My Story
Não FicçãoThis is a story about all the struggles I've faced throughout my life and how to this day i'm still struggling.