Lost My Favorite Girl (Joel Miller)

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by Integra1127

by Integra1127

Warning: angst, drinking

Summary: Pt5 of Should Probably Leave. Joel wallows in misery with the news that he's lost you forever. Inspired by - George Jones' - I Just Lost My Favorite Girl.

A/N: Last angst chapter, I promise lol.

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Sitting through that dinner had been utter torture for Joel; watching the woman he loved being happy with someone else, getting engaged to someone else. It was awkward and painful having to sit and pretend to be happy for them when in reality; his entire world had shattered at the scene he was greeted with when entering your family home. Even though she had been hiding it well, Joel could sense that it had affected Sarah just as badly. You meant everything to his daughter, not only had he lost you but so had she. Sarah had saved them both from an extremely uncomfortable after dinner socializing by claiming to be not feeling well and for that he would forever be grateful to her for. After they had both gotten home and she had assured him she would be fine by herself; Joel knew he had to get out of the house or risk breaking down in front of his daughter and was something he didn't want to further burden her with. So, that was how Joel had found himself where was now; alone in a bar, trying his best to drink the heartache away.

In a bar room I'm standin' with a drink in my hand
Trying to hide from the world
Drink dulls my memory and so here I stand
I just lost my favorite girl.

The clock ticks away as Joel knocks back one drink after the other, hopelessly failing at drinking the thoughts rushing through his mind away.

He never shoulda let you go those years ago, shoulda allowed himself to be shellfish and held onto the love you were freely offering. Shoulda called you the first week after you left like his heart and brother had told him to do, shoulda never gotten involved with Tess. Shoulda gone after you when you fled Sarah's party, shoulda contacted you immediately after ending things with Tess. Shoulda attempted to speak with you at your parent's party, instead of fleeing like a coward. Plain and simple; he shoulda never waited so long. If he had done it all, then he woulda been the one you'd be engaged to right now.

Shoulda, woulda, coulda... was useless to him now.

I'll stay till I'm no longer able to stand
And drink till my head's in a whirl
I'm living the life of an ungodly man
I just lost my favorite girl.

*
Joel was wallowing so deep in his own misery that nearly didn't hear his phone ring, seeing that it was Tommy; he lets out a heavy sigh before answering.

"Yeah?"

"Sarah called me" Tommy responds.

"Then ya heard the news" Joel states matter-of-factly.

"Yeah..." Tommy sighs sympathetically, "sorry, Brother."

"It is what it is..." Joel murmurs in response, eyes beginning to tear up.

"Where ya at?" Tommy enquires when realizingly his fragile state.

"Bar" Joel manages to utter out.

"Be there soon" Tommy states, ending the call.

Last call I heard the bartender say
Now I must go out in the world
With no place to go to here I can't stay
I just lost my favorite girl...