Project 1940S

Chapter 28

My parents were not happy and neither was I. Even though I knew that many people fell out of believing in God, and many people fell into believing in him, I felt like some sort of personal revenge would be waiting around every corner. Maybe that meant I still believed in him (and of course I did) but I was no longer accepted, and I knew that. 

I tried to push away those thoughts, busying myself with the Christmas preparations. My parents may not have been happy with my choice in relationship, but I was still their daughter and they wanted me home for the holidays. I was not sure if this decision would stick for the future ones though. 

So, I busied myself. Steve, Bucky, and I went with my two brothers, plus Clementine, Sam, Donavan, and Brock (because we weren't allowed to get away from them if I was going out with my boyfriends) everywhere. 

The Cincinnati Zoo, the Cincinnati Art Museum, the Newport Aquarium, the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, the Columbus Zoo, EnterTRAINment Junction, Union Terminal, Wright-Patterson Air Force Base (Steve especially loved this because of the Presidential airplanes), COSI, Sauder Village, Mammoth Caves, Reds Hall of Fame and Museum, Kings Island, and the hockey rink up on Miami Campus in Oxford (we also joined some of the staff and students to play broomball). 

For the most part, we were left alone. My brothers didn't really want to chaperone, so they'd wander off a little ahead of us or behind. Clementine and Sam would drift off as well. Donavan and Brock didn't really try anything because my brothers would beat the shit out of both of them, so they usually left us alone as well. 

And it worked. I forgot all of my troubles for some time. I would squeal over the red pandas playing in the snow. Steve and I would laugh at Bucky's white mustache from whip cream. We'd pick out hot fudge from the candy shop at Kings Island winter fest and try them. 

It was the way that I wanted my entire life to go, eventually with kids to show all of these places to. 

But once we got home and we went to bed, I would lay in the darkness of my room, staring up at the ceiling. Most nights, I cried myself to sleep. I was a mess and I could tell both Bucky and Steve felt guilty. 

So I tried even harder. I giggled and laughed and smiled the entire time I was with them. And it wasn't even faked. I was just genuinely happy when I was with them. When Bucky squealed like a girl when he found out he could pet the stingrays at the Newport Aquarium (I think he petted them for like an hour straight), or when Steve gasped in delight at seeing all of the different train displays at EnterTRAINment Junction, observing the minute details of the handcrafted buildings and sets. 

My parents went with us sometimes, and after we got home from the train museum, my dad pulled me into a separate room. He gave me a surveying look and then said, "Elizabeth, pumpkin." 

"Yeah dad?" I asked. 

He was silent for a little longer and then said, "These two men are good for you. And while I can never fully approve of the relationship as a God-fearing man, I'm glad that you have them. They're going to keep you safe, they're going to protect you, and if they don't, I don't mind shooting them. I love you." 

I laughed at that. It wasn't much. But it was enough to lift the weight off of my chest. "Thank you dad, I understand." 

He nodded and then asked, "You still have your gun, right?" 

I grinned, "I do." 

"Good." And then he headed to the living room to watch college football. 

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Christmas Eve came and I busied myself in the kitchen, helping my mother bake the ham, stuffing, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, and whatever else needed to be prepared. She mostly lectured, the way she always did, about grades, my hair, my makeup, how I had to look presentable.