Blood Magic

Chapter 1

219 days after turning.

198 days after The Battle for Baldur's Gate.

When life is infinite, all numbers are minuscule. When time is limitless, its passage is pitiful.

Yet, my life prior to that fateful day 219 days ago, although mundane and insular, was anything but miniscule and pitiful.

It was mine.

My life was special to me because it was the only one given to me, and now there exists no life, no soul left within this vessel. This vessel, which consumes but does not grow, destroys but does not create, charms but does not cherish, is of a faithful vampire spawn who traded a real life for a false death in the name of love. But, in the end, love rejected me simply because I rejected the love I never knew I had: the love for life itself. Feeling the sun on my skin, casting magic for the fun of it, kissing my lover by the sea at sunrise: all of it free and all of it mine.

And now it is gone forever. Not even my master, Astarion Ancunín, has my life, for he possesses only this undead vessel of which I no longer share any attachment to.

Where did that girl go when she was turned into a monster? Did her soul descend past the depths of the Nine Hells into the void, erased completely as if never existing at all? Or did her true father Mephistopheles keep her locked between his claws along with the rest of his cursed children? I would scour every bookshelf I could to find the answer, but the question of my soul and whether winning it back is possible remains a mystery as long as I am kept within these cold palace walls.

Being soulless could be worse, I convince myself, and it will be worse if I push my luck speaking of souls or freedom or happiness with him, as I've foolishly attempted before. There is no such thing as a warning to Astarion. Who could forget when he forced me to feed exclusively on Araj, a sanguine-obsessed drow with tainted blood, for a month? He called it a "bit of fun," having gifted her something of which I was so adamant he refuse to endure himself once upon a time.

I can still taste the metallic bloodrot on my tongue.

The cause of this punishment was that, having been inspired by my former companions' request to join them in a distant battle during the victory reunion last month, I had asked Astarion if I could escort Damrius and Lae'zel through the Underdark on their way to Chult to ensure their safety. I anticipated a humoured "No" at best and no feeding privileges for a time at worst, but insult led to injury when Astarion asked if I intended to utilise this journey as a means of escape to which I vehemently denied. It didn't matter. His mind was set on my betrayal, failing to see how his torture was the only betrayal at play.

After that punishment, I chose to satiate any nostalgia and yearning for companionship through reading about the adventures that brought me to this fate. Astarion hasn't allowed me personal belongings for some months now, so I had to get creative to save my old travel journals. Through a series of hidden tunnels, advanced puzzles, and pre-established illusionary walls in the palace dungeons, I've tucked away a secret sanctuary where I seek solace in the echoes of a dead life. Most importantly, the path to the sanctuary is 1000% Astarion-proof, establishing the safe haven as the only piece of freedom he can never take from me. Hells, it is the only piece of power he can never take from me. The great ascended vampire, a master of bloody carnage and decadent debauchery, suffers from an eternal affliction of stupidity; it is only a matter of time before I outsmart my way to freedom. Until then, the sanctuary is free enough.

While I could take the long way to the sanctuary with my eyes closed, I placed an ancient sigil within the sanctuary of which only I have access to fast travel to at a whim, so it takes mere moments to arrive to safety—that is, when I get the rare opportunity to disappear. Unfortunately, there are watchful eyes within the palace at most hours, so those few moments of time I'm allowed in the sanctuary are truly sacred. I figure that the best time, like usual, will be a couple hours after everyone has gone to rest, when the sun rises high and hot while I sink into the cold dungeons below. Until then, I seek out Astarion to determine his schedule for the night and whether I can manage a clean break to quiet solitude after all.