Object of Desire

* Chapter Twenty : Fates Decide

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To utter the words that I had was possibly one of the worst ideas I could ever conceive. In the eyes of everyone in the room, they would be asking themselves how I could be so stupid? To turn back on previous word and make a complete idiot of myself with such an asinine request. I was the fool, the hanged man, and epitome of the tower— every pair of eyes laid on me had only drove that point so much deeper. No matter how I said it, kept my phrasing light and arbitrary, that shallow and disappointed glare would never leave the faces of my family.

"Terzo," Nihil rested both of his hands on the table, taking the lead of conversation for once, "we do not need to keep having this conversation. You know of the issues surrounding Ms. Daniels, having her here would bring about an entire world of chaos." His breathing was slow before he took hold of his oxygen mask and sucked in deeply.

    "The fates have given us the answers to all of our questions, we don't need to keep looking deeper for something that won't appear, dear." Sister Imperator added, achingly observing Nihil as he regulated his breathing.

    "I know, but having Eliza here would make Veda comfortable. Is that not what we have been trying to do?" I defended my point, knowing Veda was a place of agreement between all parties.

    "I do not see why we cannot just have her here for the ceremony and then send her back home." Primo moved into conversation.

    "Veda said that this Eliza is her only friend, it would be cruel to take that away from her." I retorted, wishing he would see things from my side just once.

    "She will make friends here!" Nihil spoke from behind the mask. "And no chaos!" He angled his hand upwards, pointing one boney finger to emphasize his point.

    "I just want her to be comfortable, that's what you told me to do, fratello." I turned to Primo, a cautious look in his eyes as they shifted between Sister Imperator and myself.

    "And what else have we been telling?" Sister asked, her hands clasping around each other and resting firmly on the table. "Hmm, Papa Primo?"

    "Nothing, Sister," Primo replied cooly, always as tough as a rock, "just that Terzo needs to do his best when trying to get on Vedas good side. You saw his inappropriate behavior last night." He waved his hand down, once again pinning this back on me.

    "Mmm, yes," she gently shook her head, "but she appeared fine tonight. You held her hand during dinner, made comforting small talk, and even kissed her cheek. She seems more than comfortable to me."

    "She is comfortable with me." I pressed my hand firmly against my chest. "But she expressed to me she had a traumatic experience when she was baptized before. If we are going to have the grace to accept her, then we have to play by her demands."

    "She was baptized in a Catholic Church, what do you expect?" Nihil finally removed the mask, yet was still yelling across the table.

    "What I expect is that we make this the best experience she ever has. When she thinks of being baptized, she does not think about what happened before and can only recount a lovely day. When she walks the halls of this very Abbey, she will do so with her friend next to her. She will have someone to turn to, someone to help her open up, someone to truly make her feel like she made the right choice." I could feel myself begin to ramble, every word tumbling too quickly from my mouth to catch them on their descent.

    All eyes were on me again, the silence taking over as everyone thought over what I had to say. Unfortunately, due to my rambling, I had described what I should be to Veda. It was obvious, everyone picking up on it as I sat down and accepted my defeat. I had either lost the argument because I proved that I hadn't done my job properly, or I had lost it because my point had no true meaning to it at all. I was cooked, served on a silver platter and ready to be torn apart by willing patrons. Veda will be disappointed for sure, she may not even want to stay if I can't get her friend here... that would have been a better talking point.