Object of Desire

Epilogue

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The winds of autumn rustled in the trees, leaves drifting in the chilled breeze to become part of the fallen. Change wasn't bad- necessary in the way of life and how nature had intended, suffering always making itself present before the grandeur of life could truly ever take hold. The sun rises early in the morning, gracing the earth and all she has to offer in the warm rays, melting the snow and feeding the flora who accept this change. And when the sun sets, the moon takes her rise over the landscape, the sun casting his glow onto his star crossed lover so she may shine, but in her own way.

Today was one of those days where you could see the moon and the sun sharing the same sky, gazing towards one another and basking in the warm glow they both shared. A waning crescent, and a brilliant sun, only ever able to truly see each other on such occasions, and it only felt more fitting now as I gazed down to Terzo who sat on the steps.

He was placed beneath the first beams of morning light, streaks of an almost perfect white refracting from the glow and accenting how truly dark his hair was. Smoke bellowed around his head, a cigarette placed between two fingers as we waited for Dew to return to us. No paint, a large robe covering most of his body that was clad in pajamas- I'd never thought I would see it if I'm completely honest. So rested, so relaxed and content in this early morning glow, taking occasional puffs from his cigarette and adjusting the strands of hair that fell around his face. Casual... he was casual, and it had me even more enthralled than it had the night I first saw him.

Beneath the shadows of the Abbey, back rested against the cool wall and well hidden within the absence of light, I could only watch with some kind of wonder and admiration for this man. After it all- the pain, suffering, a grueling life spent alone for so long... I had closure. I had a new sense of freedom and purpose, a life that I could truly relish in, and a man to come home to every day. In a way, it could be seen as arbitrary: a woman only finding her true self after years of suffering, only to fall in love and have all issue be absolved. But Hells- I'll take it.

For once in my life, I was pondering with a smile on my face. Though it was subtle, only a hint of curve against the edges of my mouth, it was still there and omnipresent. The expression could be felt in my chest, a swelling sensation that had me lost for breath in the deep swell of exultation. There was a floating fondness that clouded over all of the horrid moments I had ever experienced in my life, the prospect of what was to come being all the more reason for me to return and start this new life. Or even in my stomach, the organ itself turning over every time Terzo would turn back to me and offer the same smile I wore. I would never get tired of it- of the butterflies, the deep flush that would take over my cheeks and tips of my ears, how wide my tongue would feel, or even the small jolt of electricity that shot through me when I'm reminded that he's mine.

A flock of crows fluttered past the veranda, cawing to each other as they traveled towards the dew soaked grass and mingled for breakfast. Their disturbance was caused by the thundering sound of wheels turning against dirt and gravel, an all black car rolling its way up towards the two of us and effectively turning off the last bits of sacred silence. It would be some time before Terzo and I could have this again, and that swell in my chest seemed to deflate at that thought.

As soon as the air was sucked out of me, it was pushed back in with a quick force that could have brought me down to my knees. Terzo came before me once more, his hands taking a gentle hold of my arms and carefully uncrossing them from my chest. With my gaze turned up, whispered tears gracing my lids, and my smile faltering to a small tremble: I couldn't find a damn thing to say to him now.