FELICITY

XVII

I hold my breath as I watch Timothy walk into the house through the front door. Without contemplating much, I get up and I run back outside. I pace about with trembling feet and a rapidly beating heart, I feel nauseous. 

Timothy, please do not do something absurd.

Standing here paralyzed by fear has made me realize that I should do what Timothy asked and go with him. I love him and he loves me back, I cannot say the same about Madam yet. I still wish Madam can accept me, but he is right, that may never happen. I should run into the house, boldly take him by the hand and run out with him. Hopefully, someday she will regret all that she has made me endure. For now, I need to listen to Timothy, I need to be with him.

I move my shaky legs until I am at the front door. The thought of Madam's reaction to seeing me makes me want to crawl back to my cage. I know there is nothing she can do to me now because I have Timothy to protect me, but I do not want her to think that I am abandoning her. I do not want Madam to be mad at me. I take deep breaths before stretching out my hand in an attempt to turn the doorknob, but then I hear something; it's loud, deafening. It is the same sound I heard when Madam shot the pot-bellied kidnapper, only that this time it is not muffled.

Oh no! Timothy has found her gun and shot her. Is the first thought that runs through my mind.

I turn the doorknob and I rush inside. I see Timothy standing, I do not see Madam. I race to him but as I get closer he slowly falls to the floor. He lands on his knees and then his face hits the floor. If I had any color on my face, it would have washed off. It feels like the room is twirling around me in slow motion, my mind is clouded. I cannot think straight. I start trembling, my lips are shaking, and my eyes are watering. Timothy is on the floor, blood is flowing out of his body and forming a pool around him.

I look up and then I can see Madam huffing and puffing like an animal, her fingers are tightly wrapped around the rifle. She shot him, she shot my Timothy! I clench my hands at my sides, pure anger and hatred start to drive through my body, my breathing is ragged and heavy.

I let a single tear slip out of my eyes. The tear rolls down to my cheeks and I can taste its saltiness in my dry mouth. I start moving towards Madam, slowly and rigidly. It feels as though someone is controlling me, or something—rage. She is staring at me, challenging me with her eyes, daring me to defy her. I keep clenching my fists, I am shaking more vigorously. I walk till I am only a few inches away from her. The beast inside me that I did not realize existed forces its way out of my body. I plunge forward and then with a tight grip, I wrap my arms around the rifle.

"Die!" I scream. I do not know how, but now we are both clinging tightly to the weapon. She is shaking my hand, trying to take it from me. The shock of her seeing me challenge her must be weakening her, and the anger in me must be strengthening me. I am not sure which it is, but somehow, I have the weapon facing her stomach. I stare at her in so much disgust, she is still staring at me threateningly while trying to fight the rifle away from my grasp. She is struggling and I am struggling to keep it in my hands. In the course of the struggle, I accidentally pull the trigger. I am angered, I wanted to shoot her intentionally. I take a step back and let the rifle slip out of my hands. I watch as eyes widen and her mouth hangs low, before she drops to the floor.

I run to Timothy and I kneel beside him, he is struggling to keep his eyes open. He looks up at me and then his weak lips curve up in a smile. "Cinderella," he says through bloody teeth. He coughs and a lot of blood follows, it hurts me to see him this way. This is my fault, I should have listened to him. "I wasn't going to kill her," he croaks. "I was only going to intimidate her, I didn't know she had a gun, she had it with her when she opened the door," he struggles to get the words out or to keep his eyes open.