From Within The Sand (Sunstreaker and Sideswipe Bayverse)

Chapter 23

My hands seem stuck where they rest on the keyboard. My body doesn't want to leave, neither does my mind, but there is no point in me staying. I clench my teeth together as I will myself to move. A part of me is beginning to panic. Why can't I move? I watch the tip of my fingers begin to fade, slowly flooding up my hands to my arms.

"No, no, no!" I panic under my breath.

I focus all my energy on my hands, attempting to restore my color. Trying not to show what's going through my head, I try to relax. It's difficult, but slowly as it starts, my color comes back. Then seconds later I can move my fingers. As soon as I could move everything else, I shut down my computer and bolt out of there. I race out of the hangar, avoiding soldiers while I can. I sprint down the hallway and almost miss the door to my room. Once I'm in, I slam it closed behind me. My heartbeat would be racing if I had one. Though, my body can't stop going through the motions of breathing fast and heavy. My chest rising up and down rapidly. This is a nightmare.

My hands that I hid behind me after I closed the door come out and I stare at them. I'm terrified they will start to disappear again. My body being frozen, unable to move. It brings out the fear I had after saving Prime. Only this time, it felt worse. I watched myself slowly disappearing. Like watching myself die. I can't die yet. I have to apologize. Whether or not they accept it, I can't leave without saying goodbye to the twins. I've never wanted to live so badly in my life.

"What is happening to me?" I cry out, any weight I can maintain pulls me to the ground, my back against the door.

"I hate this so much. Why didn't I just die? This is worse. So much worse." I shudder. My whole body is shaking.

I'm not sure how long I stay on the floor. Time means nothing to me at the moment. I've never felt so numb. The realization of me actually dying makes me feel grim. My life was taken from me, now it dangles over me. High enough that I can't reach it, but close enough that I can still see it. Whoever is holding the string likes to play games. Sometimes pulling it out of sight, reminding me that I am dead. What a cruel way to hold onto someone's life.

"I saved Sideswipe and Prime, why keep me here to torment me with these games?" I ask no one.

"Your purpose hasn't been fulfilled." A disembodies voice echoes around me.

The voice is loud, making me cringe. Yet I'm sure heard it inside my head.

"What do you mean?" I can't stop myself from asking. Everything falls silent again.

"Tell me!" I demand pushing myself off the floor. "I have the right to know."

"Now isn't the time. You will know soon enough." The voice rattles through my skull.

"Are you behind me being a ghost? Why make me flicker or fade in and out if my time isn't up yet?" I ask through clenched teeth, looking around the room.

"You will learn more. Now isn't the time. Keep doing what you are doing. I will be back to explain when it is time." It answers me. My head hurts more with every word it says.

Once it finishes talking, the pain vanishes, and I let go of the grip I hold on my skull. Tension is released from my body. I feel free and reenergized again. I drop my hands to my side, and I sway on my feet for a moment. That felt way too unreal. So many questions come to my mind, flooding it. I can't decipher which ones to ask first. Not that there is anyone to give me an answer. There is one question that keeps pushing forward.

"Who was that?" I ask out loud, glancing around my empty barracks room.

About and hour someone begins to bang on my door. I flinch in surprise from my chair. I still haven't quite recovered from the previous invasion, but I get up anyway and head to the door. My hand grips the handle and I hold my breath. The handle turns slowly, but as soon as it clicks back, I swing the door open. One of the soldiers from my platoon stands there, trying to catch his breath.