all too well - Theodore Nott

chapter 16

"Annie and Fletchly, you go up against each other," Harry called out during Dumbledore's army meeting.
Justin Finch-Fletchly shrugged like he thought it would be easy. "Okay."
They moved across the room from each other, and he began shaking his arms out, cracking his neck, and smiling. Annie wrinkled her nose up and glanced at Selene with raised eyebrows, who shrugged and held back a laugh. Justin finally raised his wand, and Annie did the same. Harry told them to go, and Fletchly swung the wand above his head dramatically.
"Stupify," Annie said, her voice bored but loud, echoing in the large room.
Before Justin could respond, the spell flew across the room in a dart of light, slamming into him. He was lifted into the air and slammed into the wall with a thud. He slid to the ground with a groan. Selene snorted, and Cas turned around to hide her laugh in her hand.
"Selene and Tristan, you two are up."
"Harry," Tristian whispered loud enough for her to hear. "She gives me permission to copy her potions homework when I forget to do it. I'm not going to hurt her. Can you put me up against someone else?"
"It doesn't hurt that much," Harry assured, "like getting punched in the stomach."
"I can't punch my only chance of passing the fifth year in the stomach."
"She'll be fine."
"I'll be fine, Tristian. No matter what the outcome, I will always give you the homework," Selene laughed, waving his worries away.
Selene went over to her side of the room. Tristan stared at her from across the room, his wand gripped tightly in his hand until his knuckles went white. His face was scrunched up in concentration and determination, and it was impossibly annoying. Selene rolled her eyes, and he narrowed his at her in response. Selene wanted to punch him, so she decided. It would be like punching an annoying elf who would never leave you alone after potions class in the stomach.
"Go!" Harry yelled.
Selene raised her wand, but Tristian had already yelled it before Harry was finished talking. The spell flew towards Selene, except the aiming was off. It flew to the side, hitting a column and riccheting up to the ceiling and then to the wall behind Seleene to finally sore through the air and into Tristian's stomach. He flew back and landed with a thud, skidding across the ground.
"Oh my gosh," Selene stumbled up from her ducked position that most of Dumbledoores's Army had taken so they didn't get him by the haywire spell. She raced over to Tristian, who was groaning on the ground, his hand holding his ankle.
"Are you okay?" Selene asked, leaning over him.
He shook his head and continued to hold his ankle, whimpering in pain.
"Here, let me." Selene pried back his hands to see an already-swollen ankle. "We need to take you to the hospital wing."
"Selene," Hermione whispered, worried. "We can't take him there."
"Why not?"
"Because people are going to start asking questions about why his ankle is hurt and no one knows about this."
"Pomfrey doesn't ask questions, and if she does, then I can lie. She trusts me, and if I tell her that it is not a big deal, it will not be a big deal. Really."
Hermione bit her lip, but after a pause, she nodded. Selene helped lift Tristian up. He stumbled slightly, but Selene wrapped his arm around her shoulders and helped him out the door and, after looking booth-side, into the hallway. He groaned and stopped.
"Put on your big boy pants and keep walking, Tristian." Selene grunted, yanking him aside.
"But it hurts."
"If you don't continue walking, I will let you find the hospital wing by yourself and have to limp there with an extra broken bone."
He sighed and looped an arm around her shoulders again, and they continued walking.
"Ms. Parkinson."
Selene turned around fast, almost causing Tristian to fall over. She gripped his arm and pulled him back upright against her. She looked up to see Umbridge and... Nott. They were walking down the hall towards them, their pace fast and purposeful.
"Professor," Selene said, plastering a smile on her face, her heart skipping a beat as her brain raced for an excuse. "What are you doing in these parts?"
"I would ask you the same thing, Ms. Parkinson."
Selene glanced at Theodore, who wasn't looking at her but was staring intensely at Tristian. "Um, well, in the Ravenclaw common rooms, there are these trick stairs that get offended really easily if you even step on them weirdly. Well, they tripped his shoes because they didn't like them, and he fell and sprained his ankle. But it's fine now because I think his shoes learned their lesson. Did you learn your lesson shoes?" Selene loomed down at the shoes awkwardly, trying to stall for a better excuse to come to her head. "They said they did."
"That was a lot of unneeded information, Ms. Parkinson," Umbridge said, looking slightly disgusted by her.
"Well, it was such an interesting story. I wanted everyone to know that we can all sleep peacefully at night now because the Shoes and Stairs war is over."
"I'm assuming you're taking him into the hospital wing?" Umbridge said, ignoring what Selene had just said.
"Yes ma'am."
"Well, why are you coming from this direction if it happened in the Ravenclaw common room?"
"Well, because this dick—I mean, this jerk head." She squeezed Tristian's side, and he raised his hand slightly to say hello. "He said he knew a shortcut, but it brought us further from the hospital wing instead of closer."
"You're the one who said you knew a shortcut," Tristan groaned, leaning his weight more on Selene as he lifted his foot off the ground.
Selene dug her fingernails into his side, causing him to flinch, and gritted her teeth. "It was definitely you, Tristian. I think the pain is getting to your head. It is obviously getting worse. We should get you some help for that ankle." She turned to Umbridge and said, "I'll see you in class, Professor. Goodbye, Nott."
Selene looked at Nott briefly. He glanced at her for a second too, giving her a small nod of acknowledgment, and then returned his eyes to glare at Tristian and their arms, which were wrapped around each other.
After they had gotten a good distance from Umbridge and Nott, she turned to Tristian, "What happened with you and Nott? He seemed to really dislike you."
"The glaring and stuff? I do not know. I have never met him. Maybe I fucked one of his roommates in their dorm and woke him up. I have fucked a lot of closeted Slytherin boys, so it is not that unlikely."
Selene let out a surprised laugh. "Well, that would just be unfair to hate you for that. A person has some needs."
"Right?" He asked, smiling through the pain, "But, like, you'd be surprised at how many people don't like me for it."
"How many people have you fucked in a dorm room that you have to say 'maybe' for?"
"Not a lot at all, but I am usually drunk when I get up the nerve to go up to a Slytherin. And I always end up making a life long enemy whenever I do instead of a lifelong partner. You know how it is."
"I do not," Selene laughed.
"Really?"
"Well, maybe a little. The only person I have ever kissed happened last year, and he was a Slytherin. He did run away right after, and then later came back to completely insult me as a person and my entire family."
"Well, you seem to have really good taste in guys. Just like me."
"Oh, I absolutely do," Selene laughed. "Glad, that was obvious."

"What did you get?" Selene asked as Theodore came up the stairs for their tutoring session, a piece of parchment grasped in his hands.
"An E," he said, a small smile almost growing on his face.
"Good job!" Selene exclaimed, smiling hugely, "Now we can't start aiming for an O."
"What did you get?" He asked, taking a few steps closer to where she was sitting.
"Oh," Selene said, shrugging and looking down at the star chart she was unfolding, "it doesn't matter."
"What did you get?" He repeated.
"Nothing."
"What? Was it bad?"
"I got an O," Selene blurted out, looking up.
"Oh. Why didn't you say that?"
"I didn't want you to feel bad about your E. Because it is a really good grade." She shrugged.
"I know it is."
"Good. Now come here, you need to know this pattern right here for class tomorrow."
He moved across the room and sat beside her on the ground. Selene started turning the parchment so that the stars would line up perfectly with him. She felt his eyes burning into the side of her head.
"What?" She asked, not looking up.
"Nothing," he said, still looking at her.
"Well, maybe pay more attention to the stars."
"Okay." He responded but still didn't look away.
"So over here on the parchment by your foot, we have..."
"Do you know how marriage works in pureblood households?" He suddenly asked, interrupting her.
Selene gave a small laugh. "My whole life, I have gotten shit for it. So yeah, I think I do."
"No," he said, looking at her intently. "Did your mom ever tell you what it's like when you're a teenager?"
He waited for Selene to shake her head. "Because there are not a lot of options in the pureblood families, they kind of assign you someone to marry. To keep the pure bloodline going. Like an arranged marriage. Daphne was that person for me."
"I don't want to hear about why you and your girlfriend are dating." Selene shook her head slightly.
"Please, listen to me." He waited for her to nod. "There aren't a lot of options, so it's not like there is someone else we could marry if it doesn't work out because that's someone else's match. So you are sort of stuck with that one person. Like, Draco and Pansy have always been meant to be together."
"I don't understand what this has to do with astronomy," Selene said, her hand gripping the parchment so hard it crinkled.
"I felt bad when I kissed you, not because I did not want to do it. Daphne is a horrible person, but she doesn't deserve what her family would do to her if we ended things."
"Oh," Selene said, surprised.
"Before that, I had been pulling away from her because I didn't like her like that. She had a suspicion that something was going on. She came up to me one night when we were in our second year, and she told me she could never love me. She said she refused. She wouldn't be forced to love someone. But then she said that we had to do this. That me and her are tied together, whether we like it or not. We swore that we wouldn't ruin it for the other person. Our parents would kill us if either of us broke the promise. I know I am a coward, but if my father finds out," he trails off.
"I understand," Selene said quietly, her hand automatically going to her stomach, where the scars lay and where nothing ever would lay beneath. "I understand probably better than anyone else what they would do."
"I just can't sit here and look at you while you teach me about stars and planets and know that you still think I regret what happened. Because every time you look at me, I want to do it again. Every time you push your hair out of your face or laugh and smile, I want it more. Everything you do puts me in agony because it makes me want it more. It makes me want you more."
"Theodore," Selene breathed out, shaking her head slowly. "We can't. I mean, it was such a disaster last time, and we are just now barely getting over it. We cannot just start it over."
"I don't care. I don't care if it complicates things," he whispered, his face twisting in pain. "It hurts me how much I want you. You are all I think about."
His hand reached out, cupping her face, and she stopped breathing. She searched his eyes to see where the unspoken question lay. She knew she should say no. She knew that she should find him a new tutor and walk away. But he found herself nodding yes, and that was all it took for him to pull her into him, colliding their lips.
It started soft, and then it grew hot. His hands traced her body, and she tore her hands through his hair, lightly pulling at it. He pulled at the tie around her neck, loosening it and, at the same time, pulling her impossibly closer. He gently pushed her backward until she was lying on her back with his body pressed flush against hers. He kissed the corner of her mouth, slowly making his way along her jaw.
Suddenly, all too soon, someone started climbing up the stairs, the metal clanging, and they broke apart, scrambling up to their feet and as far away from each other as they could. The person climbed about halfway, but someone called them back down, leaving Seleene and Theodore in silence, their heavy breathing filling the space. Selene glanced at him slowly. His top buttons were undone, showing a bit of his chest, and he was breathing heavily and staring at her.
Selene swallowed nervously, "We should probably get back to studying."