My Reality (Zayn Malik love story)

Chap. 5*

*edited Oct. 11, 2020*

~Litsy~

I couldn't say yes. I couldn't, two weeks with him; how the hell will I control myself. I want to imagine what a future with him will feel like, but I know I can't be that naive. These next two weeks will help me process what to do and how to go on from here.

"Madam what would you like to order?" We decided to go to one of my favorite restaurants after leaving Disneyland. We were in a booth at the back of the restaurant. Niall, Louis, Harry sat on one side while I sat with Zayn and Liam.

"What would you recommend for all of us?" I ask looking up towards him.

"Well...."

*

Once our order is served and everyone is eating, I get the urge to make sure I'm clean. TJ's words repeat in my head, "Eat slower!" "Keep your mouth clean, you're embarrassing me" a few months with him and I question a lot of what I do. Being in front of five gorgeous guys makes me more insecure about it all.

"I'll be right back, I'm going to the restroom," I tell them as I get up.

"Wait." I turn around to see that Zayn is walking towards me.

"You don't have to come Zayn." I say waiting for him to catch up.

"But I want to, and I told you I would protect you. Plus, I have to go to the restroom too." His accent making me forget my thoughts for a second.

"Ok then." Once inside the restroom I notice my mess of a hair, how embarrassing. In the end, I decided to put my hair up into a ponytail and fix my bangs to the side. Before TJ, I struggled with my own insecurities, he picked on those and I always have to work on fighting the negativity. It's a struggle to fight your own thoughts, let alone have someone point them out and make the urge to fall stronger. Breathing deeply, I focus on reassuring myself and reminding myself that he's not around anymore. Heading outside I let go of my thoughts and try to focus on the present.

"What took you so long?" Zayn says joking around.

"Why didn't you tell me that my hair was a mess?" I ask raising an eyebrow.

"I didn't think it mattered." He said.

"Well now you know it does." I pout as I look back at him; he was not much taller than me, five inches at the most.

"You look beautiful." He said while looking straight into my eyes. I felt him searching for something as he did. How does he do that? Make me forget where I am and what I'm doing. Make me feel like there's more to the world then black and white.

"I just put my hair up." I look down so he won't see the light blush.

"I've only seen you with your hair down." He shrugs and smirks at me.

"I forgot about that and thank you. You're not too bad yourself." We head back to the table and finish eating.

*

Night arrives quickly and with it, time to take Zayn to go get his things to bring them to my house. He made quick work to pack up and we left.

"Litsy, where am I staying?" Zayn said once we were inside my house.

"Umm where do you want to sleep?" Turning towards him as I hear him stop behind me.

"As long as I have a bed to sleep in, I don't care."

"How about my spare bedroom?" Gesturing towards the room by mine. In reality I want him to sleep in my bed, with me, but I know I wouldn't be able to control myself. "Sadly, there is only one bathroom, so we have to share." I say with a smile.

"I'm fine with that, after all it's your flat, I'm going to take a quick shower if that's fine with you?" He says motioning towards it.

"Yes of course, my home is your home," Smiling at the sound of that. He nods and goes into the bedroom. I head into my room to change into something comfy. I'm not a person who likes to take showers at night, so I don't think Zayn and me will have a problem with that. I put on some pj's and head to my living room. As I walk out, I see Zayn coming out of the guest bedroom with just boxers on and shirtless. I close my eyes and quickly turn around.

"Litsy, you ok?" I can hear the amusement in his voice, it's funny how he finds this amusing, note the sarcasm.

"Umm yeah, I'm fine, I thought you would be in the bathroom by now." I say still facing my bedroom.

"Oh, sorry about that, I usually walk around like this and forgot where I was. I'll put on some sweatpants." I can hear him going back into the room.

"Yes please," I want to look at him, but I know I shouldn't. I already find him attractive but I'm trying not to fall for him. I don't want to get hurt, especially not by the fans. I have a twitter and I'm afraid of what they'll post, so being his friend is safer.

"Litsy you can turn around." By the amusement in his voice I know he's smirking.

"You're not messing with me?"

"No, turn around." I turn around and see that he wasn't lying.

"Thank you." He just grins and goes into the bathroom. I head to the living room to watch some TV before bed.

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