Dance Of A Parasite

5

҉S҉҉S҉҉S҉҉O҉ ҉M҉҉U҉҉U҉҉C҉҉H҉ ҉T҉҉I҉҉T҉҉I҉҉M҉҉E҉ ҉W҉҉A҉҉S҉҉T҉҉T҉҉T҉҉E҉҉D҉

He patted my shoulder gently, reassuring me that everything was going to be perfect to where it would be surreal. I was nervous. Anxiety filled my body anew, the familiar sense of breathing exercises throwing me into confusion. Four years. I was only going to be here for four years. That wasn't much, I guess. Once I complete school, he was going to put me in charge. I had my life set out in front of me but even then I wasn't sure what I was going to do. 

"You've been through five schools. This one isn't any different," he said. It was a weak attempt to make myself feel better but it didn't help. At my last school, my mouth was almost sewn shut. I didn't understand what made him think I was ready to go back to the same place in a different font. "Now, this time, you need to promise that you'll talk. Let's practice. I say hello, you say hello." 

Turning toward me, a smile stretched across his face as he pulled his arm out. "Hello." 

Silently, I shook his hand. There was a look of disappointment spreading across as his smile dropped. 

"No, no. You say hello back," he said. "Hello." 

I took a deep breath and shook his hand again. "He ... llo." 

Sighing, he revoked his hand. So did I. "Goodness, let's hope this school gets some words out of you. You're a lost cause." 

My mother ambled towards us, holding my backpack. That was the only thing I brought with me. The rest of my things belonged in the trash. "Has he spoken?" 

"Just a bit. The most he can say is hello," he said. I spoke more now than I did before. He didn't know that I knew how but didn't want to. Forcing myself to talk to people made me feel like I was going to choke. My doctor called it 'selective mutism'. 

"Toughen up, will you? How're you going to live in a ginormous school when you don't even talk?" she smacked the back of my head. 

He looked around. "Come, we're going to talk to the principal about your ... disorder." 

Grabbing my wrist, he led me inside of the building with my mother following us from behind. 

Large hallways with multiple turns were filled with talkative students. A lot of them were abnormally tall and almost too perfect to be real. In that building with overgrown vines encompassing it with nature, I felt small. Insignificant. From my first impression alone, I knew I was going to have trouble finding friends. 

My biggest issue was that this place had dorms and my parents intended for me to live in one. They said it would help me overcome my 'fear' of talking. It was less of a fear and more of pursuing and giving in to peer pressure. Even as a kid talking was hard. I didn't remember much of my childhood but my relatives teased me because of how I used to stutter a lot. I suppose my 'selective mutism' was more of an insecurity, trauma thing. That was what my doctor told me. 

When we arrived at the office, he let go of my wrist. He held onto it so tightly it left a red mark. 

Sitting on the chairs pushed against the wall were four boys, who looked like delinquent wannabes. 

One of them, a blond blue-eyed boy, saw me and smiled. I couldn't acknowledge him back before I was being pulled towards the office lady's desk. 

There was a red-haired one that looked familiar.

"Hi. You're the mute kid?" she asked, scanning my face. She turned toward my parents. "What was his name again? Key something."