~*~ THE IMPOSSIBLE ~*~ {Stray Kids Fanfiction}

Chapter 6: What Do You Even Know

Time seemed to move a little slower that day. Mogchoji had been sleeping the whole day, as she normally did after and episode. The boys kept their minds occupied as best they could throughout the day. Every so often, someone would wander to her room to check on her. It was nearing sun down. Felix and Hyunjin were out picking up dinner. The two maknaes were playing video games as the normally did to relax, however the usual yelling and bickering was absent. 3racha were sitting at the table working on the final details of the upcoming mini album release. Minho sat at the opposite end of the table from 3racha inspecting dance practice videos for any flaws they may need to address later.

***Meanwhile upstairs***

The sudden invasion of her horrible memories caused her to jolt awake in a slight panic. She frantically panned throughout the room, checking her surroundings. She fuzz in her mind quickly passed and she began noticing evidence of that morning. The water bowl sitting next to her. The washcloth floating inside. The water bottle and aspirin beside it waiting for her to ease the head and body aches that she would undoubtedly feel. She could hear the sounds of the beach still softly echoing around her. Realization hit her and she began frantically searching her room. She threw pillows and shuffled things around but it was nowhere to be found. "Fuck" she said in a low growl. She exited her room and started down the hall, quickly noticing the new hole. She sucked in her breath before continuing downstairs. She could see 6 of her boys as soon as she took the final steps of the stairs. She was so quiet that no one noticed her walk in. "Who added the new wall decor in the hall?" she spoke up in a slightly sarcastic tone. All eyes suddenly shot up at her.

"Hey babygirl, how are you feeling?" Chan questioned as he stood and walked to her reaching for her hand. He gently brought her in for a hug which she gladly reciprocated until it caught her eye. Minho had laid her phone on the table near him to monitor for more incoming messages. He saw the color leave her face as she looked from the phone back up to him. Chan, still wrapped around her, could feel her body suddenly tense. He pulled away to check her expression then turned to see what had caused her sudden change of emotion. He realized immediately what was happening and pulled her in for a tighter, more secure hug. Minho walked to her and brushed back the hair that had fallen in her face.

"Hey Kitten, shhhh, it's ok. We're gonna figure this out Ok?" She closed her eyes forcing a tear to fall. Just then, the door swung open causing her to jump back. Felix and Hyunjin stopped in their tracks when they saw the action.

"Jiji?" I didn't me.." Hyunjin began to say before she interrupted him with her soft shakey voice. "It's ok Jinnie. I'm fine."

"Are you hungry? We got food." The deep voice behind Hyunjin slowly rumbled.

***

Dinner was quiet. Too quiet for her comfort. She finally broke the silence with the question that had been looming in her mind. "Who did I hurt this time?" She didn't lift her eyes from her plate but she could feel
The atmosphere grow even thicker as they all looked over at her simultaneously. "Kitten, you didn't hurt anyone." Minho softly replied from across the table.

Chan took her hand as he added to Minho's statement. "Babygirl we were able to get this one under control without it going that far. We're proud of you." Those words hit her like a ton of bricks. No one has ever told her that. She finally lifted her head to meet the gaze of those surrounding her. "How?" She questioned through her breath.

"The day after you moved in, we did some research and found a counselor at a women's shelter nearby. She told us what to do if it happened again." Chan replied as he slowly ran his thumb across the back of her hand. She sat quietly for a moment speechless not able to understand why they would do all of that just for her. She shook her head in shame. "I'm so sorry I'm causing all of this trouble for you all. I should have just turned your offer down that da.."
"Noona, stop!" Jeongin spoke up with an unexpected tone. "Why would you even say.." "Because that's all I am Innie. Trouble!" She suddenly snapped backed.
Silence fell again for a brief moment as everyone was too stunned to speak.
"What do you even know?" Hyunjin finally interjected. "That day on the plane, Jiji? When you were helping Hannie. Do you even know what happened in that moment?" He paused staring at her. Tears were beginning to roll down his cheeks as he continued "Do you think meeting you again in the Cafe was an accident? You were meant to be a part of us and I never want to hear you suggest something like that again." Silence fell again over the room. No one knowing what to say. The sincerity in his pleadings didn't go unnoticed by her as she sat in thought. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she squeezed Chan's hand. After a few moments to gain composure, she tried to soften the atmosphere. "So who decorated the wall?" She chuckled. She didn't expect the atmosphere to drop again. No one looked up. "Seungmin. When he saw your phone." Jisung answered.

She let out a deep sign. "So you all saw it?" She questioned softly. They all nodded their heads in response.

"If you aren't ready to talk about it right now, Kitten, we won't force you. But we need to know how to keep you safe. I don't know how to do that without information." Minho calmly explained.

She felt her heartbeat rising and her palms became clammy. She had never told anyone. Chan noticed her struggling with herself and spoke up. "We can wait or speak privately. Whatever you're comfortable with babygirl." He laid a soft kiss on her temple and brought her further into his embrace. She shook her head and took a deep breath. Nothing prepared the boys for what they were about to hear.

"My dad moved us to America when I was barely old enough to speak. He wanted to make sure I had the best opportunities in life. We did everything together as a family. He taught me to sing, play guitar and piano. Mom taught me to cook. I was always happy. When I was 16, my parents were killed in a head on collision and I was sent into foster care. I was up one night. Couldn't sleep. I was depressed so I grabbed my guitar and started singing a song my dad had taught me. As I was singing, my foster brother came in the room. He was little older than me. That was the first night he.."

She paused and took a deep breath. Her voice began to shake and she gripped Chan's hand even tighter, causing his knuckles to turn white.

"I was too scared to say anything so I buried it. A few weeks went by... nothing. Then I was singing again in my room when I heard him at the door. That time was worse than before."

A range of emotions filled the room. Felix and Jisung were both fighting to keep a strong face for her but they struggled keeping the tears controlled. Minho was balling his fists under the table. Jisung had noticed and took his hand to calm him. Chan held her as she spoke. Each word destroying him piece by piece. Jeongin rested his head in hands covering his face as he listened. The others stared in shock.

"It happened over and over for several months before I realized what I did to cause it."

Everyone's hearts sank when she accepted blame for what happened but they allowed her to keep speaking.

"One night while he was on top of me, he called me his little siren. It was my singing. It was like an invitation to him. I never touched my guitar again and never sang another word. Well, until the other night."

Realization followed by heartbreak flooded each one of them. They immediately knew what she was thinking that day.

"Months went by without him touching me. I thought it was over. Then one night he came home high. He ended up dragging me to the basement and..."

She felt her throat close up and her lungs started to burn.

"Ok that's enough Kitten." Minho stepped in, seeing her eyes begin to glaze over. She took a couple of deep breaths and continued. "No, I have to finish this." Minho eased back and allowed her to continue. "The next day, while everyone was out, I left and never looked back. I took a bus as far away as I could get. A couple of years went by before I started getting messages telling me he knew where I was. I ignored them until he actually showed up at my job. I slipped out the back and left before he could see me. I left the state again. A couple more years passed. I was in med school, doing clinical trials. Everything was going as well as it could have but I started getting messages again. He didn't know where I was though. I changed my number again and tried to forget it. Then last year, on the night of my birthday, he showed up at my apartment with 2 of his friends. I ended up in the hospital that night with a concussion, broken pelvis, and unable to have children. It took months of recovery. When I was finally able to work again, I saved every penny I could and came here to Seoul. I thought that would work but..." she motioned to her phone. "He's somehow gotten my number again so it's only a matter of time befo..." by this time she was sobbing breathlessly.

"I'm gonna take her back upstairs." Chan whispered as he lifted her from her chair and walked toward the stairs.