My Perfect Idol

EPISODE 3

LALISA POV

wow I have made it "she giggled" it's been such a long time and I have achieved so much. Lisa ponders as she reflects on what she has been through.

It's December the end of the year in 2021 and she always reflects on the good and the bad everytime this time of the year...ushering in the new year with good positive vibes always wishing for the best outcome of it all.

It's been such a long I recall how hard being a trainee was , the struggle to be here now, the disappointment everytime the debut date was postponed and we had to continue training, to keep being motivated I remember crying because I didn't know if I could continue this anymore on the basis that one day I would debut. The endless calls with my family, my fears of all this just being a waste...seeing bam debut while am still stuck with uncertainties keeping a good positive energy was not easy but having a loving and supportive team near me was always a blessing to me. I remember meeting jisoo and rose for the first time who knew these girls would be with me in my successful times😂 it's always easy to say fighting and let's debut together but getting to that debut lineup is not such an easy feat.

Lisa you are going to make it, rose would say while strumming her guitar in the practice room. Lisa remembers while feeling the night breeze on her Terrence with her cats.

Being an extrovert that I am was easy to get acquitted with other trainees when I learned Korean but seeing the friends you made being eliminated was not so fun. It hurt when the friend you thought you might debut with gets eliminated and sent back home. You start doubting yourself am I next🤷

When we met teddy and started cutting some songs I just knew this was it. He was so famous among the trainees back then and when they gave us our debut I remember calling my parents and crying it was finally happening we were here, we have made it. We cried, laughed and rejoiced together the four of us.it was a merry moment I ll probably never forget ..we debuted and the songs were well received but yg was yg I guess 😂 they went radio silent on us on our next comeback 2017 we only released one song😂 I remember how frustrated we were back then it was really not the best management. In 2018 we released dddd and it was an instant hit but the shock came when it charted on billboard charts we were so shocked we were basically screaming excitedly in the dormitory like little girls.

Those charts bought us so many opportunities and we were invited to Coachella the biggest music festival. I remember performing there it was so electric. In 2020 we released our full album I was so happy we also had a netflix documentary about our journey where we shared some of our journey. And I released my solo in 2021 in September it was postponed multiple times not proper promotions false promises and all that but I just try to remain as positive as it is. I know this company is not for me anymore I just can't do it anymore. I have sacrificed so much only to be blind sided everytime. It gets to the part where you get tired as a human being of always been understanding. Why is it always me that has to compromise? Am a human being as well I pretend to not know what is happening just to have a little bit of peace of mind because it gets too much.

I think about relationships; I just start laughing alone surprising my cat who jumps out of my arms looking at me curiously with it's feline eyes.

Relationships has not been my strongest points during these past few years it doesn't help that the Korean entrainment industry frowns upon dating when you are working as an idol. "It's considered a scandal"; she sighs. I grew up watching my parents being inlove with each other and loving couples around me and I want that but it is not easy to find a genuine person or relationship in this industry but everyone is just being extremely cautious of the media. Am not completely innocent I have had past relationships which has not worked out due to one or two reasons and it's fine it's completely not easy to keep a relationship with such a hectic schedule and the company on your ass every two seconds 😂.