so long, london • charles leclerc

quatre

"pulled him in tighter

...

each time he was drifting away "

...

RING! RING! RING!

i put my pen down and stop writing to pick up my phone. it was a call from lila.

"hey babe u having fun?"

"OK BEFORE YOU SAY ANYTHING I WANT YOU TO LET ME FINISH EVERYTHING I NEED TO SAY BEFORE U EVEN MUTTER A WORD!" i could barely comprehend the words that just came out of her mouth from how fast she just spoke. "just hurry up and tell me"

"ok ok so i may have lied to you.. the family friend i told u i went to have brunch with is actually not a family friend... it was jacob. AND DONT U DARE START SPEAKING IM NOT DONE ESTELLA JUNE ROWE!"

...i didn't even say anything...

"so we went out for brunch and it was actually the best thing ever and i may or may not be in his hotel right now about to stay the night.."

i waited a few seconds before speaking up to make sure she was done. "um. well! thank you for dropping all this at 11:28am on a friday morning, i love you too lila grace moss. now, let me just get one thing straight before i say my peace, when u say jacob... you wouldn't possibly mean jacob elordi? your ex?"

"yes him... but he's not my ex! we never dated."

"that just makes this worse lila, he wanted things casual while you were deeply in love with him. and now you're in his hotel to what? go back to being casual?" lila was silent for a moment as i knew i had hit her right where it would hurt. but what bestfriend would i be if i didn't?

"he's different now stel. he said he actually wants to try the whole dating thing. i'm not here to have sex with him, i'm here because we chose to restart and start from the beginning. we're getting to know each other."

lila and i argued back and forth for a little longer before i eventually give in to her. no matter how much i knew all about how jacob treated and made lila feel, it wasn't my place to stop her from giving him a second chance. i mean maybe he did change?

"anyways what are you doing right now." she says, switching the subject to me.

"well, i uh- i played music again. i listened to what you said last night and i called taylor for some advice, anddd now im here on my living room floor writing a new song!" i say excited. out of everyone i knew, i knew lila would be the most happy for me right now.

"stella!!! omg! im so so happy for you!! you don't know how long i've been wishing for you to start singing again! you know im already dying to hear it as soon as i come home tomorrow!" i chuckle at my bestfriend. "of course elle, now stop talking to me and talk to your mr nate jacobs."

"ew stella don't call him that. ok bye i love u mwah." she says before hanging up.

i smile as i put my phone down and go to pick up my notebook again.

i was almost finished writing a new song called 'scared of my guitar'.

i had taken taylor's advice literally and wrote about what i felt in the moment,

and i was very scared of my guitar.

after a few more minutes i was finally finished. my heart softens at this familiar feeling of finishing a song.

usually i'd send it to my producer or someone on my team, but this time, i just take a picture on my phone and close up the notebook. little steps.

i may be writing and singing again, but
there was no way im ready to get back into a studio.

after i take a picture, i get a notification from emma my manager.

...

manager emma

hi stella.
its emma. i know you asked for some space but its been well over 2 months now. i know you're going through a hard time but if you still want to go on that world tour thats almost 3 years overdue, then we need to get back on track.
why don't we have a chat about it over lunch? i can easily fly over from la to london by sunday afternoon.

hey emma, no thank you. there's no need to waste so much money on a tour that no one will buy tickets for 🙂 i'll get back to you when everybody doesn't hate me x

stella stop. come meet with me and we will talk properly. that's just outrageous. the world doesn't hate you because of a break up.

they do when it's with england's golden boy. you said this'll blow over by a few weeks, but it's been almost 3 months and i know you keep up with all the news articles and what they're saying about me still.
wake up emma, im finished.
maybe ill pull a reputation (stella's version) in a years time👀

as much as i would love a reputation album, you are not disappearing for an entire year.
let's talk in person properly
like i said, i'll be in london by sunday.

don't bother
i won't be there
read

...

i sigh as i watch my phone light up with emma's name at the top, calling me. i close my eyes and just let it ring. i need some air.

i quickly got up to put on a comfy set, leaving my phone on the couch with emma still ringing on the other end.

after getting changed, i don't bat an eye to the numerous notifications i received from not just emma, but other people from my team. i just grab my phone from the couch and head out to go on a walk.

..

although the weather in monaco wasn't great at this time around, just walking the streets of monaco felt amazing. i might have to go on walks every day because wow. just wow.

this is definitely the place i needed to be in.

i gawk at the view and the stores i walk past. something about monaco made even a simple drug store look so special.

i didn't even realise the smile that crept up on my face until it was wiped away from the sound of my phone ringing.

i turn all my attention to my phone that i whip out from my pocket and see that it is yet again; another call from emma. if someone doesn't answer your 6 missed calls and 22 messages, maybe- JUST MAYBE... they don't want to talk to you.

i was too busy focused on my phone that i didn't notice the body that i now just bumped into.

....
A/N just me or like... i really don't want a blue ferrari livery ... idc if it's the miami gp