𝐎𝐍𝐄'𝐒 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐘 𝐆𝐀𝐈𝐍 | ʙꜱᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ɪɴꜱᴇʀᴛ |

020

"Hey guys, we have a new mission!"

"PASS."

Tanizaki, dazai, yosano ranpo and y/n were all chilling in uzumaki cafe looking completely beaten up.

"Yeah, I guess this is our reaction after that battle with the guild..." said dazai as he laid his face on the table. While atsushi sweat dropped.

"Life is seriously hard." Y/n Mumbled as she was close to passing out.

"You can't talk! You've been sleeping for 4 days!"

"FOUR DAYS STRAIGHT OF SLEEPING IS EXHAUSTING OKAY???" y/n raised her head from that table exposing a very bad bruise on her forehead as she yelled at dazai.

Atsushi noticed it wondering where she got that from since yosano had already healed her a few days ago. "Hey y/n, are you okay? What happened." He said pointing to her forehead.

"Oh yeah,,, Long story short, kunikida yesterday offered to walk me home after I woke up. And since I was sleeping for 4 days my legs were kinda wonky and i fell. BRO DIDNT EVEN TRY TO HELP ME, i lowkey expected a kdrama scenario but oh well." Y/n said as she slumped her face back into that table besides dazai.

"Why does he not notice me..." She gumpily said, cursing the fact that she had no chance with kunikida.

"Cause you suck." She immediately earned an answer from ranpo.

"KILL YOUR FUCKING SELF!"

"Don't be mean to her ranpo, she's trying her best." Yosano backed up y/n who gave her a smile as stars were building on the h/c nette.

"She should try harder." Dazai said, side eying her as she just smirked smugly at him.

"I can make you harder-"

"I dare you to do it."

"Ok bet."

"..."

At this point everyone in the table chocked.

"Uhm- anyways! Where's kunikida san?" Atsushi asked in a desperate attempt at changing the topic before y/n and dazai would make out or something.

"While dazai's an alcoholic, kunikida is a workaholic! Aha!! Ah.. um.. not funny?" She looked down as everyone's judging gazes were on her. "You guys have no idea of what's a refined humor I swear.."

"Anyways! I want coffee." Said dazai as he noticed the cute looking (not really) Waitress who insisted him more on getting a life insurance with how big his bills have become.

"I want a sweet curry!" Ranpo raised his hands, as the Waitress nodded.

"Something that'll pick me up please." Yosano was the next to order.

"I can pick you up-"

"Not with that ugly forehead."

"LITERALLY WHO ASKED YOU DAZAI!?"

Atsushi sudenrlt turned his serious mode on.

"We have new reports from the military. Aperently there are foreign organizations hopping to take on what the guild has left." He explained, holding the files in his hands tigher.

"They wouldn't cause much problems." Ranpo said mostly keeping his eyes closed.

"Later that day I saw one of the guilds member.." he remembered encountering Lucy holding some kind of safe lock. ".. I just hope they won't be teaming up with these foreign organizations to bomb this place or something."

"Danger is like the bitterness of coffee. For those who are ready for it it is savory." The shop owner sudently spoke while making some coffee manually.

"Oh so just like pain!" Y/n said with a smile as atsushi sweat dropped, remembering the girl's ability and how she dealt with it like everysingle day.

"That's the shop owner for you!"

"You can believe he's been doing coffee for 30 years!"

"Even when washing his hands the smell doesn't come off!"

"That's all I've got for me." The shop owner said calmly as the agency members were praising him.

He received more praises as everyone was happy having such a cozy caffe below their working area.

Anyways! Time skip

The shop literally got busted.

"What happened here..." asked a very much worried atsushi, as everyone's eyes went wide with how much chaos this place seemed to have endured.

Y/n had to squint her eyes to see in the darkness of the place as the shop owner was hidden in one of the corners holding his hands in his hands- don't ask bro.

Everyone rushed to his side inspecting if he had any serious injuries or sum and bro may God be with this poor man.

Yosano nealed besides him inspecting his fingers that were missing nails...

"Its nothing too bad, don't worry.."

"I've had a nail removed once, and trust me- it WAS bad..." y/n sudently popped put besides yosano.

"I'm just glad youre all okay.." that one line hit hard to literally everyone in the agency as their eyes were wide open and filled with rage.

"..."

___

In a random rat filled basement down there was an American looking fat blong man holding a can of finger nails and toe nails, shit talking the agency and praising his basement.

Bro looked like he was enjoying life until...

Boum.

Kenji literally oppened that one door that bro was praising the same minute using one hand.

"We have to atleast thank you... you've made work a little bit intresting." Dazai snickered, beside him was ranpo yosano kenji and y/n. Atsushi having dealt with the guards and tanizaki with the surveillance cameras.

"This is not done! One literal phone call and I'll have every single criminal organization at your chase!!" The burger fan yelled as he brought his phone to his ear.

"ARE YOU CRAZY MAN!? do you not know anything about Yokohama?? Anger the detective agency and you'll never survive!"

Everyone heard that from the other side of the phone.

Anyways!

"Can I torture the American looking one? I'll have him watch the twin towers fall on repeat while skining him alive...  my queen yosano will heal him continuously, ONLY FOR ME TO DO IT AGAIN!!!" y/n chuckled darkly as she got her handy knife from its case, what further brought up her joy was dazai agreeing to her suggestion. And so did yosano.

And with that the torture began!

___

"Ah... this was relaxing."

"True.."

Anyways, back at the uzumaki cafe, the agent were now more drained, and definitely not ready for any other kind of work.

"I wonder what's got these foreign organizations to want from the guild?" Tanizaki asked sipping on his coffee.

"I don't think there's anything of that sort, they were probably blinded by some false leads that were put up by someone..." Dazai raised his head so that his back could rest against where he was sitting.

"Dont you think so too? Y/n." He turned his head so that he'd look at y/n sipping on her f/d. Before slightly leaning his head on her shoulder resting it there.

"Yeah.." y/n didn't mind, she let him rest his head on her shoulder. Practically dozing off recolecting her thoughts while sipping on her drink.

The reason why he'd do so didn't matter to her to be honest.. She honestly just wished to never cross paths with him ever again.

Fyodor Dostoevsky.