Inseparable

Parting ways

December 24th, 1941,

"Today is the day," Steve thought to himself as he stood in front of Bucky in the long line inside the U.S. Recruiting and Induction Station, on Governor Island. He'd never been in the New York Harbor before, least of all on a ship. The way his stomach still churned worried him but he didn't dare show it. Bucky was already doubting his success and tried to make Steve change his mind more than once that morning. "Next!" a soldier called out, looking down at his paper. "Knock 'em dead." Buck said encouragingly, patting him on the shoulder as he stepped forward, "You too." Steve was sure he would, Bucky was in peak condition. As he stripped and stepped onto the scale he said a little prayer, hoping for a miracle. Bucky would definitely get in and if he didn't get in he didn't know what he would do. He wanted to prove to Bucky that he was worth something and that he could take care of himself. That he would need Steve just as much as Steve needed him. He'd relied on Bucky for so much and wanted to do something more than just encourage him with words. 

*koff *koff Steve silently cursed himself as the doctor checking his lungs sighed at the sound after he asked him to cough. "Hrm?" What "hrm"?" Steve asked, his heart clenching. "I'm afraid a chain is only as strong as its weakest link, son. Our job is to forge as strong a chain as.." "No! I NEED to do this!" Steve shouted, jumping off the bench. The doctor tried to calm him, "Hey, don't take it so hard my boy! There'll be five girls for every fella in New York soon enough.." "I want to serve my country." The doctor looked at his paperwork again before pointing to the sign behind him with his thumb. "Says here you have art training. Somebody has to draw those posters. There are ways to serve your country other than fighting." Damn, that was just what Bucky would say. "But this is the only way that matters to me." Steve protested. The doctor looked at him with sympathy, "I'm sorry son. This is BIGGER than you." and he stamped a big red 4 F on Steve's papers.

Bucky stood in the hall waiting for Steve when he ran into one of his boxing buddies. "I'm goin' in the Navy, how about you?" Bucky shook his head. "Naw, regular army. All the way. They already took me." He grinned, "Stationed on land, pal. That's where the women are.." He paused when he heard a door creak and looked up to see Steve's crestfallen face. Instantly he knew that Steve had failed. "Steve... I'm..I'm sorr-" he didn't get to finish his sentence as Steve walked away, "Don't sweat it, Buck."

 Bucky crossed his arms in frustration and said goodbye to his pal before hurrying to catch up to Steve. He raced up the stairs after him onto the ferry deck to go back inland, "Wait up Steve!" Snow had already started to fall. "I'm going to get a second opinion," Steve said back to him. Bucky stopped in his tracks, surprised at what Steve had said. He slowly made his way over to Steve, "Second opinion? Why?" he asked. Steve just shook his head and said, "I can't explain it now, but trust me, it's important." "I know it's important to you Steve but they're all going to say the same thing.. You know that!" Bucky said, his voice rising. Steve took a deep breath and said, "I'm sorry, but I need to do this. I need to do this for both of us." Bucky looked away and sighed, "I understand." Bucky knew that there was no point trying to convince Steve otherwise, so he simply accepted the situation. He was determined to make the best of it and try to make the situation work. He was determined to stand by Steve no matter what. Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve's shoulders, "Let's get you home and warm. Until you get into the army I'm still calling the shots, no point in you freezing before we even get to boot camp." Steve nodded in agreement, and the two left for home together.

Over the next two days, Steve tried again and again at different stations, even putting himself down from different states against Bucky's wishes. The months before this Bucky had made sure to save up enough money over the months to provide for Steve's food and medicine. He secretly made his buddies promise to check in with him from time to time and write to him about how Steve was faring. He paid off the apartment so Steve didn't have to worry about rent and the day before he left he went bulk shopping. Steve on the other hand was completely avoiding talking about it when Bucky tried to bring it up. He frowned when he saw Bucky coming in, arms loaded. "I'd appreciate a hand if you don't mind pal," Bucky said as he set some groceries down on the table. "I didn't think you'd want a weakling like me as a partner." Bucky sighed, "Not this again Steve. You know there's nothing I can do to change this. I'm leaving tomorrow and that's that. I got you some stationary if you wanted to write me but I guess you're too mad." Steve got up and walked out the door, "I'm not that mad." he said as he came back in, closing the door behind him. "Ya, sure? Because you've been glaring daggers at me for a week straight!" Bucky jokes. Steve smirked, "I know, I know. I'm sorry Buck. I just..."

"I know Steve, don't sweat it. How about we make our favorite dinner and I read you the Hobbit tonight, just like I used to?" Steve nodded, "I'd like that Buck, I'd like that a lot."

December 27, 1941

The next morning Steve woke to find himself alone on the couch, a blanket tucked around him, and voices outside. He hurried outside, wiping sleep from his eyes, finding an army truck waiting as Bucky said goodbye to his pals. "Buck, don't tell me you were going to leave without saying goodbye!" Bucky turned with a grin and walked towards him. "Ya crazy? Of course, I wouldn't. I was just about to wake you." Steve pulled him into a hug and patted him on the back. "I'm gonna miss you, Buck." Bucky pulled away and straightened. "You'll survive you firecracker." "Let's go!" a soldier shouted from the truck. "This is it, Bucky said, turning away, "See ya in ten weeks pal." "You kick their asses for me alright?" Steve shouted after him. "Ya bet I will!" 

Steve grinned as Bucky waved. He'd promised himself that soon enough that would be him going off to training. In the weeks that followed, Steve kept his promise to Bucky to stay out of trouble as best he could. He collected scrap metal for making weapons and continued training on his own. For a while it kept his mind off Bucky's absence. But eventually, the days without Bucky weighed heavily on him. He was filled with loneliness and uncertainty. He was desperate to see his friend again. 

Meanwhile, Bucky was kept busy with boot camp, too busy to write Steve as many letters as he had wanted. Mostly he kept his letters to asking about how Steve was faring, trying to leave out as much about the training as possible to not upset him. Although he enjoyed parts of the training he still missed and worried about his friend. Steve told him that he was still training as Bucky had taught him and hoped to join the army before Bucky got his orders. Bucky smiled at his friend's dedication but hoped to God that he would quit. He could survive but bootcamp was tough, too tough for Steve. Bucky moved up quickly, becoming one of the best snipers. He was told he would have much value with his strong work ethic and natural leadership. As it neared Christmas and the days grew colder he thought of how Steve would be probably wrangling with some scrawny tree, and putting his stocking near the fire. It wasn't hard to envision as the letters proved his assumptions right. Steve told him a present was waiting for his return home and he wrote back telling Steve he shouldn't have bothered although his heart was warmed by the gesture.

Steve sat by the fire Christmas day, rereading every letter Bucky had sent and the Christmas story from his well-worn Bible. He prayed over Bucky's safety and asked God for the thousandth time why he made him weak and small when his heart was made to do bigger things. How long would he have to wait?