There's No Such Thing as Second Chances

Back to normal

Eric and I sat there quietly just staring at each other. Neither of us broke eye contact and the atmosphere in the room suddenly felt heavy and hot.

I wasn't expecting the kiss but I also wasn't expecting to be saved either. Both were great and I was extremely grateful that each had happened.

"I'm sorry, I probably shouldn't have done that. I know it kinda came out of nowhere" he looked nervous and ran his fingers through his thick hair.

"Don't be sorry. I'm glad it happened" I forced a smile but internally I was a mess. Did he regret what he just did?

"When I came back and couldn't find you I felt like my world was going to collapse again. I know I've only known you for a week but the thought of never seeing you again, or worse, something happening to you felt unbearable." He chuckled to himself but you could see the pain in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I got lost. I didn't realize how far I actually went." I felt terrible for worrying him this much, "how did you find me?"

"Years and years of tracking practice and sheer dumb luck"  he moved himself closer to me and took my hand. "There's another storm coming this way tonight which could push us back days. We have a few hours before it hits and, since you seem to be strong enough to make the journey, we can leave and make it there before it comes down."

My heart almost fell out of my chest. I couldn't believe I was going back home and would see my mother. I also couldn't believe that I may never see Eric again.

What will this mean for us? Is there even an us. I haven't known him for that long and he had no obligation to me.

He did state that he couldn't lose me. Did that just mean in death or did he also mean in life. .

"Ok" was all I could muster out. I wanted to ask him everything I was thinking but was too scared to hear his response.

What if he drops me off and I never see him again.

"I'll go get the vehicle ready and we will leave as soon as possible" he gave me a small smile and squeezed my shoulder as he walked past me.

I looked at the empty cabin and I let the sadness overtake me. I would allow myself to grieve this small part of my life, if only for this one moment.

I needed to see my mother and couldn't hide away forever. I couldn't do that to her no matter how much I wanted to stay.

I grabbed my shoes and followed Eric out to his jeep.

"Can I help with anything?," I saw him loading some gear into the back.

"No. I just need to make sure that we are prepared for anything and everything. The roads are practically non existent and things change every time I make my way back to town. The storm was pretty severe and there could be debris in the way. Just grabbing some tools, food, and camping gear for a worst case scenario" he continued to go back and forth between his shed and the jeep until I heard the hatch slam shut. "Ready?"

"As ready as I'll ever be" I took In a big breath and jumped into the passenger side.  My stomach was filled with knots caused Both from the excitement and stress.

Whatever will be will be, we just need to get to a phone as soon as possible.

The ride into town was fairly quiet. He seemed to be concentrating on the road and I didn't want to interrupt him and potentially cause another life or death situation.

Things were pretty uneventful and I was grateful for this small stroke of good luck.

"We're about ten minutes out" he glanced over at me and I nodded.  I could see the forest becoming a bit more sparse and we finally turned onto something that resembled a road. "Do you need a minute?"

"Yes please" I nodded in agreement and he pulled the vehicle over to the side of the road.

Emotions were swirling inside me and I felt like a panic attack was about to come on.

"It will be ok, people will be happy to see you and your life can return back to normal" he tried to sound encouraging. 

"I'm happy and excited to see my mother but I don't want my life to go back to normal" I sighed, "Will I ever see you again?"

There I said it. I was mortified but wanted to know regardless of his answer. I needed to know before I stepped into the craziness that I knew I was going to follow. 

"Do you want to see me again?" He looked at me and it seemed like he was almost hopeful.

"Yes, I do" I smiled

"Then you will see me again" he squeezed my hand and we were moving again.

Ten minutes later, we pulled up in front of a little building which said "grocery store" but didn't look like anything at all.

"This is the grocery store, post office, coffee and snack shack" he laughed and I could see the humour. As It didn't look like any of those things. 

"Will you come with me," I glanced at him hopeful. I don't think I could do this alone.

"Inside? Of course!" He laced his fingers between mine and smile reassuringly.

"No, I mean. Come with me back home. I don't want to face this alone, and I know this sounds crazy, but I know with you by my side I'll be ok" I tried to hold back the tears that were now running down my face.

I knew I sounded crazy.

I knew he would say no.

But I needed him more than I ever needed anyone else in my life.

"Ok" he answered surprising the shit out of me.

"Are you serious?" My heart started beating a mile a minute.

"Yes, I am. I already packed a bag, you know, just in case" he grinned from ear to ear. "Cmon. Let's get you back to your mom" and with that he pulled me inside