Lancel Lannister Imagines

The Faith P2

Lancel was a flurry of motion inside the Sept, preparing for evening prayer. It was a task he always took pride in. The routine and focus always helped purge his mind of impure thoughts, and for a moment he could simply get lost in the rhythm. Lighting the candles. Arranging the Seven-Pointed Star. Even if it was the most lowly of the tasks. Now the evening service had begun, and he took his position beside some of the other novice members of the Faith Militant. The high sparrow began to speak leading the prayer, Lancel let his head hang low listening to the prayer intently but his mind betrayed him, as he got flashes and flickers of Lillyanna...

The high sparrow was droning on, but Lancel was... somewhere else. He had thought he had calmed himself down, buried that sinful warmth that was present within him. But as the High Sparrow continued, he got flashes of her. A glimpse of a smile, or a laugh. Or a touch... He gripped the table fiercely and hoped that he would not let his mind wander during the entire evening prayer. His cheek burned where she had kissed him, and his mind flooded with all the kisses they had shared when in the red keep together, he remembers

The night before Blackwater...

The thoughts and memories were assaulting him. He couldn't help but feel a... warmth from them. The memory of her lips gently pressed to his, the way she gently cupped his face and ran her fingers through his hair. The wine upon her breath... How she whispered his name... he remembers so much of that night when they kissed with such passion, when they made love before the battle just in case he didn't come back, there were words then whispers that he'd be wed to her but that was all the past now...

He had to resist the memory of that night. For that was a night of drunken passion and lust mixed with fear. They had both thought he would die. That there was no future. He had felt true love for her that night, and he had whispered promises he had not kept... He couldn't let his mind linger on those memories. For his body was reminding him exactly how he felt...

He was relieved when the prayer ended, and the time was over. However, another memory stuck to him. That of her promise to come back tomorrow. He pushed the thought from his mind, the images of her coming to pray next to him. Sitting at his side, and the smell of her hair when he knelt beside her...

Perhaps this was a test. To see if he could resist the desires growing inside him. And at the moment, he was failing.

The other members of the Faith were all talking, about what he had no idea. Their words simply bounced off him as his mind began to plan. He had to get her out of his thoughts, and the only way to do so was by throwing himself into his duties. By making a pilgrimage. Maybe across Westeros to Oldtown.

The thought had merit. He quickly approached the High Sparrow. "Father, I need guidance."

"Lancel, of course, speak your mind my son" the High sparrow nodded

"I wish... to go on pilgrimage. To walk to Oldtown and see the Great Sept, and the Citadel. To spend time in worship."

"I see, a pilgrimage is a very key part of any fully devoted follower of the seven, however it is not one to be taken lightly and should be something you dwell over and meditate over many times and years before your spirit is ready. I have never heard you speak of pilgrimage before in truth tell me, is something else leading?"

Lancel should have expected the High Sparrow to question his motives. The man was not a fool, and he had long since seen through the golden lion of Lannister. He considered the High Sparrow's words and decided it would be better to give a honest answer than to lie. "I have... been... distracted as of late. Sinful thoughts have assaulted me. I need to remove myself from my current environment."

"sinful thoughts tell me of what sin brother Lancel?"

That was the question he dreaded the most. "Lust," The word came out with a whisper. "Sinful and impure thoughts of a woman. I... need to be away from her... them... that's what is right, isn't it? So I can purge my mind and soul."

"I see, lust is often one the younger members find tricky. Of course, we never wish to offend the great work of the maiden at making the women of Westeros beautiful but our role as men of faith is to appreciate but not enjoy a fine line many struggle to walk, especially at your age, tell me have you struggled with these thoughts often?"

"No..." The answer came out faster than expected. And not completely dishonest. He had never felt such lust before, or at least with someone he considered a friend, or was familiar with... "It only began when this one particular woman and I began speaking recently. We have a... history that I have been struggling to forget."

"I see, memories can be sinful to look back upon with pride and envy dear boy. And memories of women my goodness even the best of us struggle with the lust and pride of maidens of the past. But a pilgrimage will not aid this Lancel. If these feelings come to you now then the gods are testing you, putting you to a test likely to see if you shall rise as high as they plan. You should meditate over these thoughts, go to her and confirm your faith with her, remind her of the sin you shared and ask her to repent with you. Bring her light Lancel"

A test. The high sparrow's words gave Lancel a small sense of relief. He was struggling because this was a test. A test of his faith. But the High Sparrow's recommendation had him hesitate for a moment. To bring her light. To have her sit with him as a repentant member of the Seven. It seemed so simple, so easy. But also dangerous. To sit with her. Close to her...

But the high Sparrow's advice seemed to give him a goal, a path. A way that he could perhaps get her out of his mind for good. "I will... speak with her. Pray with her. To repent." Not that he could actually repent, given their history. But perhaps he could bring her light.

"good, meditate tonight on what you may say to her"

"I will." And yet... his heart would not calm itself. He had plans... to speak to her the next day. Alone in a Sept. He knew he should be nervous, anxious, repentant... but somehow, he could almost say that he was... excited.

Excited to spend time with her.