HIS PRETENSE BRIDE

CHAPTER 18

Alexa's POV
 
A tear slips down my eyes as I stare at the reflection of a woman I know and do not know.
 
Some months ago, I was Alexa—super clumsy, poor, and single. Today, I have turned into a sophisticated, rich bride to Xavier Gold, the most eligible bachelor in New York.
 
I refused to wear a white dress on principle.
 
White dresses have their own significance, especially on a day like this. Brides wear white dresses to signify their purity, love, and faithfulness, among others, to their partners.
 
But Xavier and I do not intend to share any of this. This marriage is based solely on the will to bear him an heir.
 
No love. No faithfulness. No loyalty.
 
Just like he mentioned yesterday, we are allowed to date other people after the baby is born.
 
That was what I dreaded the most. He was not going to put in any effort to make us stick together, even after the baby was born. 
 
As soon as the baby is born, he will probably get rid of me, even if I want to still be here.
 
Another tear rolls as Sofia trots into the dressing room in a sky-blue dress, contracting my own light blue wedding gown.
 
"Wow, you look gorgeous,” she mutters with admiration in her eyes.
 
With a hankie, I quickly wipe my tears, but not before she notices and I reply to her. “Thank you.”
 
“Are you crying?” She demands, holding my hands and watching me carefully.
 
I shake my head. “No.”
 
She sighs and remains silent, making the air thick with tension. Because I can't face her, I avoid her gaze with my head bent low. I can't trust her. I can't confide in her.
 
I don't even know who to trust when I have no one. No one to speak my mind to. There is no one to speak to who will understand me freely.
 
Sofia is the wife of Xavier's best friend. They are the only ones in attendance for our wedding from Xavier's side. I am desperately hoping that his mother won't appear.
 
On the other hand, I'm hoping Aunt will be the only one in attendance, or possibly with her husband, who comes home twice a year.
 
“Are you two in love?” Sofia's voice breaks into my thoughts, and I blink rapidly in surprise.
 
“Why do you ask?” Instead of responding, I ask her back with another a question. 

Did she see through me, or is she asking this because she knows something about Xavier that I do not?
 
Suddenly, it dawns on me that I don't even know the man I am getting married to today. We've spent just a few months together, but I know absolutely nothing about him except for the fact that his stepmother is trying to seize his inheritance and how he has to have an heir to get it in a legal way.
 
Aside from this, nothing else.
 
“Do you love Xavier? Are you getting married to him because you love him?” Confusion clouds my mind, but I nod my head anyway.
 
“Does he love you in return? Do you know if he does?” She demands again, this time with a grim look on her face, making my heart beat erratically.
 
“Well… I don't know. I guess yes. Isn't that why he proposed marriage to me?”
 
My anxiety is obvious. My hands are trembling. My pulse is pounding hard. My mouth is dry from fear.
 
Sofia shakes her head with a sad smile. “When Xavier told my husband he was getting married suddenly, he laughed out loud, thinking he was kidding, but obviously he wasn't. He was truly getting married, and here we are. We all know Xavier Smith is not the type to fall in love easily. He vowed never to get married, but he did anyway, which leaves us with one thing; he is not getting married because he is in love. I can see it all in your eyes, you adore him, but the question is, does he reciprocate your feelings?”
 
I want to shout at her. Tell her I don't love him. But what use is that?
 
Anger begins to shimmer within me, as I wonder if she is doing this to ruin my day.
 
This is supposed to be a happy day. I am not happy, and she isn't making an effort to uplift my mood.
 
“We wouldn't be getting married if we were not in love. I don't know what you are insinuating, but I assure you that everything you think you know of him and everything you are thinking right now is wrong.” I defend him strongly.
 
She stares at me in shock.
 
No one is to be trusted. Who knows? She might be a spy for his stepmother. They might be trying to find a way to stop or ruin the wedding so it doesn't happen.
 
I won't allow it.
 
Xavier is my savior, and I will do all I can to protect his image and help him.
 
“We are in love!" I announce sharply, in reply to her earlier question. 

“I was only in tears because my parents aren't here,'' I conclude, stepping away from her.
 
“Oh!” She mutters derisively, not looking convinced by my lie.
 
It isn't completely a lie. Just the half truth. I was sad they weren't here, but I am more saddened by the fact that my dreams of having a beautiful wedding with the man I love in the hope of having beautiful children with him have been shattered.
 
Ours is not a love marriage. It is a marriage of duty. Of need.
 
It's not what we both want.
 
Life doesn't end, does it? I have a lot to gain from this. Not only will I become the wife of one of the richest young men in New York, but I will also have a class of my own.
 
I can get a better job and be able to fend for myself without actually relying on him during our marriage or even after.
 
That is enough.
 
To top it all, I will have a baby. That is the beauty of every marriage. 
 
In fact, most women who marry for love end up hating each other, but they tend to stay in such marriages because of their kids.
 
It's almost the same. All I need to do is keep up with the pretense and try as much as I can to be happy.
 
Everything will be fine.
 
“Let's go; it's time,” Sofia mutters, the shock replaced with another smile on her face, which I find beautiful.
 
I nod at her and walk slowly behind her with my heart pounding hard, and a dark dread creeping its way into my heart.