CHAPTER 3:
-- AWAKE AND ALIVE--
And the darkness that filled my consciousness is fading, and a bright light shines upon me as I open my closed tightly eyes. I am on a white bed, white wall papers and white tiles; I have dextrose and oxygen beside me, I think I am on the hospital. I look around and I see my mother sleeping on a couch. I wonder where my Dad is. Out of confusion,
I wake my mother using my voice.
“Mom, is dad ok? Is everything’s alright? Am I ok? ”
My mom seems to be surprised as I awake her and she called the doctor right away without answering my questions. She left the room and left me behind. I am so confused of what’s happening. I waited her for moments. And as I peek to the door that is opened slightly, I saw my mother talking to the doctor and I see her eyes full of mixed emotions of relief and sadness. She is shaking, I’m so confused of her feelings, is she happy? My mom and the doctor entered my room. And I listened to what they have to say.
“Mrs. Vixen, your son is now stabled. He broke some small bones in his right wrist but he might able to talk now and he will recover sooner as I said to you.”
“Thank You, you have done so much. (Tears fell from her eyes)”
“I’m sorry Mrs. Vixen; I think you should to talk to your son.”
My mom nods her head and the doctor left the room. Mom seems to be so sad, her tears won’t stop.
“Mike… I don’t know how to tell you this.” (Wipes her tears)
“What’s wrong mom? Where is Dad?”
“Mike…Your father didn’t make it.”
“What!? Are you serious? “
“Yes Mike he’s gone.”
My tears fell in my eyes, it’s like a river flowing that won’t stop. I remembering the moments I spend with dad. I remember his sayings, his wild laughter, his corny jokes and his strong personality. My world seems to be falling apart but we need to be strong because I know that my dad wishes for it. Well, at least I’m alive and awake after that accident; maybe God wants me to do something before I walk to the underworld or something. I need to think positive because that’s what my dad does. I hugged tightly my mom and wipe her tears.
The days passed and I am fully recovered physically, mentally and emotionally. (Sighs) That’s life, you’ll never know what will happen next, no matter how you manage and fulfill your lifetime wishes. Life is full of tragedies, and don’t deny it, we all have our tragedies in life and we must accept that as a challenge from God for us to be stronger fighters and a better person. If there’s no tragedies in your life, just wait it’ll come upon you, don’t worry it will be a test for your real personality and that will also serve as a forging place where you smith your own life. Life will always be balanced, 50% happiness and 50% sadness, it will be a perfect life but I know we must get rid of sadness as a normal being and as a normal defense mechanism against depression, such as drinking alcoholic beverage (to forget what happened yesterday), having fun by going to bars and having some bitches by your side (to forget the loneliness) and having fun with friends (to cover the pain)!
The day has come, the day that I will see my father’s face again. He will be buried on a tomb today, a silent burial. I have some friends from my high school invited, some family friends and some cousins and uncles. I looked to my father’s coffin for the last time, I see his face so peaceful and it’s my first time to see my Dad in that expression of face and that chills my bones. I say goodbye and drop a wheat grain as a remembrance of our summer vacation in the barn. The coffin is now buried; my dad is also buried there, dead and peaceful.
