Today I'm gonna go to the mall by myself. I just want a me day so I can relax about everything. Me and Zach aren't a "thing", that was just kind of a spur of the moment thing, and I haven't seen Matt lately so that's good.
That's beside the point. I got ready and slipped my outfit on (top) and applied some mascara and went downstairs. I grabbed a banana and my new car keys (since I wrecked my motorcycle and it's gonna take time for me to get back on one again). I headed outside and hopped into my new grey Jeep and slipped on my sunglasses.
I put my hair up in a messy bun before I left and then headed to the mall. I turned up the radio and Jammed out to "The Night Is Still Young by Nikki Manaj." That's absolutely my favorite song. "YO DRINK IS ON YOU OR DRINKS IS ON ME" I recited the lyrics. A very expensive looking sports car pulled up next to me.
I got a closer look and saw the car was full of guys. They noticed me staring at them and rolled down their window. I rolled mine down too. "Hey I like your sunglasses." One with the really green eyes said. I thanked him before driving off since the light turned green.
The car followed me all the way to the mall. I got out of the car and walked up to theirs. "May I help you?" I asked with sass laced in my voice. "This is actually where we were going so thanks for asking." A boy with super red cheeks said with the same sass left in his tone.
"Oops." I smiled. I started to walk away but got pulled back by a strong hand. "Do you want to hang out with us?" He asked with a sweet smile. This one had highlights in his curly hair. I nodded returning the smile. "I'm Audrey." I stuck out my hand.
"I'm Jc," he said and took my hand and shook it. "That's Sam, that's Connor, Kian, Trevor, and Ricky." He said pointing to each one. I nodded and smiled at them and waved.
We a got inside and we headed to Urban Outfitters. We walked around a little bit before we decided to get just one thing from each store. We went to a couple other stores before going to the food court. I got (from the stores) a white floral skater dress with a heart cut out the back, a crop top that said 'I am not your bae', some distressed black skinny jeans, and a white and black striped halter top.
From the food court I got Panda Express and everyone got their food and we sat down. "So, what are you guys doing later?" I asked. "Probably going back to the house we share and just like, do nothing." Jc laughed. I nodded, totally agreeing.
"Well, you guys can come back to my place and chill? Meet my friends maybe?" I suggested. They nodded their heads.
"Excuse me, but can I borrow her for a moment?" The voice I was way too familiar with rang in my ears. They all nodded and said things like 'sure' or 'yea'.
I looked at them before turning around, facing my worst fear. I ran my hand through my hair before letting out a deep breath I didn't know I was holding in. My eyes started tearing. I looked back at the guys. They all looked at me with worried expressions.
I got up before they could say anything. I followed Matt to a corner of the mall nobody was using.
"What do you want." I said coldly, tears threatening to fall.
"I wanted to explain. Please let me explain." He said, a pleading look in his eyes. I sighed and nodded, signaling for him to continue.
"It's been more than a month since... It, and I haven't been doing very well. I'm not asking for sympa-."
"You told me you were going to explain and right now your rambling. Explain or I'm leaving." I said, no emotion on my face.
"Sorry, so when you were in the hospital, I was miserable, I cried almost everyday and stayed in that room with you the entire time. I talked to you sometimes, hoping you would answer me. One day, that day, my insane ex found me. She was trying to get me back or whatever and insulting you and I defended you. She kissed me first, I swear. I don't know why I kissed back. I guess I missed someone's lips on mine. I don't know. After you woke up and told me to leave, I went home and cried. So much. I tried getting out and getting a job, but I saw you. And when I saw you, I had to hold back to come up and squish you in my arms. Audrey, I lov-" I cut him off.
"Matt, don't. Don't say it. Please. If you don't mean it then please just save me my feelings and save my heart from breaking anymore than you already made it break. You don't see it but I'm so broken inside. Nobody sees it. I can hide it but sometimes I can't take it. Matt you can't do this to me. You can't just cheat on me then come and say you love me. If you loved me, you wouldn't stop thinking about me that long to... To kiss another girl. I woke up and all I thought was, I change my mind. I want to die. I can't live in a world without you. I'm surprised I even got this far. Matt you don't know how much you broke me. You have broken me in a million pieces and I cannot be put back together with an explanation and those three words. You can't just pop up and ask me to forgive you. Matthew Lee Espinosa, I love you more than the moon and the stars and the universe, but I just can't do this." I sobbed. I put my hands over my face.
"Then do this." He said, moving my hands away from my face and connecting our lips. The feeling of his lips on mine was so sweet. I was hungry for more. I deepened the kiss by wrapping my arms around his neck and secured my hands on the back of his neck. I pushed back.
"No."
