I Can Love You More Than This [Ziam Fanfic]

Chapter 3: The Balcony

There are two things I regretted tonight: ever loving Liam and giving up smoking because Liam said it was unhealthy and he didn’t want me losing anymore seconds to cigarettes. He said that every stick takes away ten seconds of your life and he would be damned if he let the cigarettes steal time away from him. I had quit that same day because I wanted to spend forever and a day with him.

But now, all I could think of was smoking as much cigarettes as possible to get as far from Liam as possible.

And what was farther than the depths of hell?

My body convulsed on the bathroom floor as if I suffered from withdrawals. I barricaded myself from ever leaving the hotel again.

Granted, it was still dark out.

The noise died down, but Liam’s pleas for me to talk was only a buzz in my ear. 

How could I have been so dumb to believe that Liam, someone so perfect, someone who never had a boyfriend because he was straighter than the space needle, could ever love me? 

An imperfect confusion that would rather live in a fantasy world where someone pretended to love me then die perfectly rational to the notion that I was going to be alone for the rest of my life. 

The floor was extremely cold.

I shivered from the touch, my fingers walking along the crevices in the tiles.

How could everything just fall apart in a matter of seconds?

From going completely blissful to wishing you were seconds away from death? 

There was a knock on the door. 

“Babe, please open the door,” said Liam, his voice cracking. “I’m sorry for not telling you the truth about Danielle, there just wasn’t a perfect time to tell you.”

I lifted my head from the floor, looking at the door.

“Oh yeah," I said sarcastically. "Why not tell me before you took my virginity, you dirty bastard? Before I devoted my life to spending every second with you? You took everything away from me," I cried. "My first kiss. The first guy I ever held hands with. Made love to. You promised me that if I gave you all of me,” my voice cracked, a few tears falling onto the floor, “ that you would never hurt me. You have Liam. More than you know! I trusted you and you betrayed me! I never want to see you, again!”

“But Zee, I love you,” Liam choked. “You don’t understand.”

“Just get out of here,” I said, my voice growing dead. I rested my head back to the cold surface. “We’re done. It’s over. I’m breaking up with you.”

Liam pounded on the door.

“Zee, no! Don’t say that,” he cried. “I love you so much. Don’t fucking say that! Zee!”

I didn’t respond.

To anything really.

I closed my eyes, drowning out Liam’s tears, and forced myself to sleep. 

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I woke up to the sound of someone tapping on the door.

I groaned as the sun filtered through the small window above the shower, and onto my face. I didn’t respond to Liam. It had to be him. Who else would it be?

“Zayn.”

It was Niall.

“Mate, open up. He’s gone. The lads and I made him rent another room. Come out. It’s time for breakfast.”