We cannot blame why people don't forgive someone because that's actually reasonable.
Forgiveness is a deeply personal process, and the timeline for it varies from person to person. It’s not something that can be rushed or forced.
When someone asks, "It's been a long time, why are you still not forgiving her?" it can feel like they’re invalidating our feelings and experiences.
They might not understand the depth of the hurt or the complexity of the situation. But the truth is, forgiveness isn’t about meeting a deadline; it’s about healing wounds and letting go of resentment in our own time.
It doesn't mean that when someone says "sorry," they automatically deserve our forgiveness. Unfortunately, not every "I'm sorry" deserves an "It's okay."
Sometimes, apologies can feel hollow, especially if the actions haven’t changed or the hurt hasn’t been fully acknowledged. Forgiveness should come from a place of genuine understanding and healing, not out of pressure to move on.
People may withhold forgiveness for various reasons. Maybe the pain caused was too deep, or the betrayal too profound.
Perhaps trust needs to be rebuilt slowly, or boundaries need to be set to ensure it doesn’t happen again. Whatever the reason, it’s valid, and it’s not something to be judged or rushed.
Forgiveness is a journey, and it requires patience, understanding, and sometimes, professional help. It’s a process of coming to terms with what happened, finding empathy for the person who hurt us, and ultimately, releasing the negative emotions that bind us.
So, when someone asks why forgiveness hasn’t happened yet, it’s important to remind them that healing takes time. It’s not about holding onto grudges; it’s about honoring our own healing process and respecting our own boundaries.
And when forgiveness does come, it will be genuine and transformative, not forced or rushed.
