Known to be quiet-natured and aloof, TV script writer Jennie Kim had written some of the most popular and well-known kdramas ever made. Yet as the days tumbled by, she soon finds herself craving new inspiration.
Lost within her own hopeful dreams o...
"If only you would notice me then we could live in this dream of you and I forever."
A gentle sigh escaped my lips as I stared adoringly from the window. From next door, I watched my Lisa laughing and joking on her way out again with her 2 best friends who visited every weekend.
How envious I was of them. How intrigued just to know what she was doing. How I wished to be part of her universe too, even just for one day.
Falling for her was so addictive yet it gave me a feeling I never knew I had. A better understanding of who I really am. It never failed to surprise me how she could set me free from all the sorrow I felt with simply a glance in my direction.
Loving someone takes strength, it takes a determination to survive those days of inevitable hardships. And I would have surpassed any challenge to be with her. Yet it seemed again that today wouldn't be our special day as I observed her happily grabbing her bag, locking her front day as she passed by the window. Her smile was brighter than the sun, caring and warm.
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By habit, I took a few more moments to admire her effortless beauty before reaching for my treasured scrapbook that I had been personally making for us. It contained sketches of her, personal poems and stories filled with words of love. I wanted Lisa to know she was the muse behind my creativity. One day I hoped she would realise that but again, that wasn't today. Within seconds, she got into her car before driving away into the distance. The moment she was gone, I felt empty and lost all over again.
So as destiny made it's choice, it appeared that this evening would be the same as any other. Repetitively mundane with the same simple routines. And so as my usual escape from the boredom, I drown myself writing a new drama script for an upcoming TV show about a love story that replicated and detailed so perfectly my dreams of Lisa and I. I wondered if I ever crossed her mind but I also feared the answer wouldn't be what I hoped.
Everything about her was fascinating and it brought happiness to even the dullest of my days. The sweet sound of her voice and her tender, gentle nature always left me constantly in awe. Dreaming of the moment when the waiting would cease and we could finally be together.
The stories I wrote weren't just for my profession, they were an archive of our unrequited love. As such, they were always neatly stacked on the shelves beside my desk that proudly stood beside my window in my home office. They were the beginning of our epic saga. A saga that began 4 months, 1 week and 3 days ago, the very moment we met.
In that time, we'd only had 6 conversations but I had felt a connection with her like never before. So although sadly we didn't speak often, I still saw her every day from next door and that in itself was magical.
Each encounter we'd had was more wondrous than the last, whether she greeted me good morning or had accidently received my mail in the post. Every time she would cheerfully smile, casually creating a brief conversation like it was the easiest things in the world to do. She would speak, I would listen. I liked it that way.
Carefully, I took my notepad from the shelf and wandered downstairs with my puppy Kuma following behind me. I often spent my days alone in the house, it was really by choice. It was just easier that way, being alone was calming somehow giving me more time for my own thoughts to think deeply about life, at least that was what I often misled myself to believe.
Sitting outside on the porch beside the front door, it was generally from here where I would watch the world go by and today, like I said, was no different. The simple interactions between people, their day-to-day routines were a source of such bewildering intrigue to me. Perhaps that's because their lives seemed so different to my own.
As a script writer, I wrote about many things. Often it was centered around ambitions, dreams, friendship, desire and then when I finished the script, I would watch someone else bring that vision of mine to life. Lately though, I had written pages and pages about romance. It was something I never really understood it until I experienced it for myself and that seemed to put a whole new meaning of what it meant to be in love.
It must have been 2, maybe 3 hours later when the sound of a car pulling into the driveway next door broke me from my thoughts with the stereo loudly playing dance music from within. It brought an instant smile to my face to see that Lisa had returned home earlier than usual. She switched off the car engine, tussling her long, golden hair that shimmered in the last of the sunlight before getting out of the car to reach for a carrier bag of groceries on the backseat.
As she walked towards the door, she suddenly turned in my direction and that simple action made my heart race like never before. It was a moment of pure elation like the aura around her burned so brightly, fanning the flames of passion and desire that erupted in my heart.
"Hey Jennie." She smiled sweetly with a gentle wave as I smiled back watching as she entered her house whilst leaving me breathlessly waiting for her return.
And just with those 2 blissful words, it had made the day complete. Today had been a good day, a wonderful day, a day filled with thoughts of her.
As she shut the curtains preparing to fall asleep early that night, I smiled. Whispering thoughts of her to sleep peacefully, closing her eyes and drifting into a deep slumber where she could greet every hope and desire she ever wished for.
And as she entered her perfect dreamland, I hope she knew that I would be missing her. Another sigh escaped my lips for if only she would notice me, to fall for me, to love me and to never stop.
