war-ridden | 최연준

9 | loml.

[ 🔗 ]

"Akari!" Yeonjun screamed, walking around the forest. It was unshielded, as heavy rain poured onto him. His white button up now soaked, his hair practically glued to his head, as he trudged along hoping to find any trace of his lover. "Please, I know you're in here." He said, as if he were fooling himself.

He walked slightly outside the stone path of the forest, the rain hitting him even harder. A slight cough left his throat, the cold air hitting him like a train. He had forgotten to bring a coat with him, he only had a small cover up to place on top of his shirt-his mind was everywhere today.

"Akari!" He screamed, looking anywhere in hopes to find her.

In the midst of his screaming, he turned back into the forest to find a figure sitting on one of the logs. A sigh of relief escaped his lips, "Akari."

"Yeonjun." She sighed.

"Oh my God, darling." He looked at her dismal figure. She was wearing a distressed white gown that was now covered in mud all at the bottom. Her eyes were red and swollen from sobbing all night, her black hair was soaked as she shivered.

"Here," Yeonjun attempted to give her the cover up he was wearing, draping it onto her arms. Immediately, she backed up and let it fall flat to the ground.

"Akari-"

"Let's end things."

Yeonjun let the cover up he was holding fall to the ground. "What?"

"We've kept this secret for too long," She refused to look him in the eyes. "And I'm sick of it."

"Listen, Akari, I know the kingdoms are against us being together. But our love is not for them to dictate, we deserve-"

"It's not them who made this decision." She shook her head. "I did. Once the secret about us was out, I decided it would only be fair to you if I told you the full story."

"Akari, what are you saying right now?" A tear fell from his eye. "I don't care what the hell the kingdom thinks, I want to be with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you-I want to marry you."

"Yeonjun, I love Taehyun."

The boy's face fell. His eyes watered, filling with agony. He felt a punch in his gut.

"Many years ago, when you and I started dating, it was my father who ordered the affair. I only pretended to love you and to be with you because my father sent me to spy on your kingdom and to plan your downfall." She refused to look the boy in the eyes so he wouldn't be able to see the tears falling flat down her face. "In the midst of it all, you fell for me and the plan went accordingly. My father got all the information he needed and now we need to end-"

"Stop talking for a second." He halted her, his breath hitching. "This can't be true, this is all because of your arranged marriage. This can't be true, Akari." He sobbed. "Our relationship was true, our love was true."

"I'm nothing but a liar, Yeonjun." She sobbed. "I wish it weren't true."

"I know, so why are you lying about this?!" He screamed. "I know our relationship wasn't some scheme for your king-"

"What do you want me to tell you!" She screamed. "I wish it weren't true too, Yeonjun! Our whole relationship was embarrassingly counterfeit."

He sobbed, tears rolling down his face as he looked at the girl across from him. "So, it's true? What you're telling me is that you were sent by somebody this whole time? Our whole relationship was a lie?" He cried. "T-This meant nothing to you the whole time we were together? I-It was some scheme for your kingdom?"

He watched the guilty girl go silent.

"So," He scoffed, letting his tears fly. "Was it fun? Did you get all the information you wanted?" He held the girl's face as she finally made eye contact with him, as he took his hand away. "The only information you could ever get from me was my love for you. The amount of love I had for you, the time I spent on every masterpiece I created for you, the endless dates I would plan for us to be together and for you to be happy. But for some reason, you still needed more. You betrayed me just like everybody else." He sobbed. "And for some reason, I wanted to believe you were different. I wanted to believe that we could really work, that we could defy all of the stupid regulations because no matter what-nothing could make me stop loving you. But now, the only thing that made me stop loving you... is you." He sobbed, finally making eye contact with the girl staring up at him. The rain hit the two of them harshly, as if it were joining them in their sobs.

"Yeonjun, I'm so sorry." She sobbed, the only statement of truth that escaped her mouth that night.

"You know," He cried. "You could've gotten all the information you wanted. But not once did you have to kiss me like you truly loved me." Tears ran down his face again. "Not once, did you have to lie in your letters expressing your love to me. Not once, did you have to touch me like I meant anything to you." He cried. "You didn't have to do any of that. But I'm still the fool for loving you the whole time. And maybe I'm still the fool for loving you even now, hoping that what you said is all a lie."

"I know, I betrayed you. I'm nothing more than a traitor." She cried. She reached for the boy's fisted hand, unclamping it and placing her promise ring in it. "Goodbye."

"You said I'm the love of your life." He muttered. The girl began to walk past him, tears rolling down her face.

Because you are.

"Just tell me one more thing." He screamed back, as she turned her head back around, taking a few steps back to him. "In the midst of all of your lies, did you ever have feelings for me?"

Yeonjun, how do I tell you that nobody has ever loved you how I have? Yeonjun, how do I tell you that everything I said to you was a lie-how this is the only way I can save your life. How do I tell you that my heart will forever long for you until the day that I die? How should I tell you that every moment we ever shared was the best thing that had ever happened to me? The kisses you gave me, the warmth you brought to me, the love that made me. How do I say that I will love you for the rest of eternity?

"No," She sternly said, her voice breaking. "Never."

Oh, Yeonjun. I wish I hated you.

"I'll never forgive you." He turned his head around, letting Akari's ring fall to the ground of the forest. He walked back to his kingdom, sobbing harder than he ever had before.

Akari, why is it that I still want to love you? That for some reason, I know you loved me? That for some reason, a part of me wants to believe this is all a lie? But it wasn't. How even now, you're still the love of my life.