It was the next day the 5 day that I am here in the hospital for nidal. 5 days I haven't talked to him and five days I couldn't apologize. I saw it I was the only one out of the family who saw it and nobody cares. I saw how he crashed. How he flew over 2 cars. How he landed and I saw his bone. I am traumatized this picture of nidal is not leaving my head since the accident I couldn't sleep cause it would always pop up and nidal would scream at me that it is my fault that he got hit and that I'm a nothing and I am the person he now hates the most in his whole life.my hand is in his hand, right now neshan and mom are here also. I am crying again my eyes red and puffy I look bad, really bad but I only wanted to be with nidal. I'm having a stomach feeling I don't know.
A few minutes later I felt something at my hand I thought I was a fly but nidals hand moved. I started crying and neshan asked what is going on. "His hand moved!" I said. Mom was calling a doctor and I was going backwards he is awake. He is going to wake up I know it. I just know. And then as the doctor comes in he wakes up and he looks so confused. "Hi nidal" neshan said. Then the doctor made him ready to like speak with us and we just waited till he left. I can't speak he is awake and not death. I can hear his voice saying "what happened?" And mom answered "you were in a car accident you were riding your scooter and got hit by a car I don't know more." I do. I think. "Do you remember getting hit by a car?" "No." They were just talking the whole time and I was in the background cause nidal is still on medication I don't know what to believe.
The next day nidal is definitely better. And in the morning I finally was alone with him but he wasn't awake and I didn't want to wake him up. But like 15 minutes later he woke up by himself he looked around and saw me "Lili how are you?" He asked in a better voice than yesterday but still not healthy. "I'm ok nidal, how are you are you feeling better?" "Well yeah kinda I think." "I'm sorry" "Lili you're sorry for what?" "I'm sorry for the argument we had the night before, I am sorry nidal it is all my fault I'm feeling so bad" I almost started crying and nidal looked at me and said "hey Lili it's alright I was an asshole to you know that" "yeah but nidal I wished for you to get into a crash and that is what happen, it is all my fault I'm so sorry." "Don't be sorry I don't want you to think that it's your fault it was a stupid coincidence I swear." Nidal I'm not saying this often but I really love you,you are my everything, you are like my second half.nidal I love you and when I'm brutally honest with you your my favorite out of all siblings." "Liyah I also love you and your also my favorite I mean your my twin you are me in female." "I don't think so but I think I'm gonna explain that an other time you are gonna talk to me about it I'm sure. Did your phone break." "Yes but it still works, I couldn't read all my messages did you write me?" "Yes nidal put please read it when your home and don't flip out" "why?" Now I have to read it" "okay but please don't tel neshan nidal I'm begging you" "I won't, twin Promis?" I giggled and we hooked our pinkies together.
"But nidal before you read it can I hug you I've missed you." "That I would ever hear that out of your mouth" "nidal shut up" I said and carefully put my arms around him. He hugged back as good as he could and then I payed down in his bed when he opened his messages. He rode it and I looked away that is going to be the worst experience of my life. "I feel that nidal is looking at me disappointed" I don't like it, so I start crying. "I'm sorry" "it is alright Lili do you want a hug? I just turned myself around and sniffed into his chest. "Are you disappointed nidal?" "I don't want to le to you a little but I'm gonna help you through it like you were and will help me through this okay?" "So we're gonna do it together?" "Yes" "okay nidal I love you" "Lili I love you to" "and look Liyah you are beautiful just the way you are okay you are with jiji the prettiest out of our family okay? Also if you want to flip I'm gonna teach you, you were born into a flipper family. If you want to be famous we could start a TikTok account or something maybe it is a thing for you who knows?" "I would love that but only when you are better nidal"
"But one more thing how bad are your tights?" "Nidal very bad I can show you" so I stand up and I have shorts under my joggers so it doesn't matter I'm pulling down my pants and show him "holly crap that is really bad but you know what we are gonna get both our lives straight again together." "Thank you"
"But nidal now that we are ourselves and I just told this to you. Do you like her?" "No I don't like Salish, only as a friend" "nidal, got u I never said Salish." "Oh you didn't?" "Nope that's it now I know it, you two are so cute together." "Yeah ok you got me, shit!" "Twin telepathy" I said joking. And we both giggled. Like 20 minutes later I was sleeping in nidals bed and he was watching TikTok or something. That is the first time I could sleep normally.
