Paint His Love

Chapter 8: A Peek To His Heart

Knowing that what's in front of him is just a dream, that's his reason why he didn't want to wake up.

Seeing Yibo, smiling like his eyes hold stars in them. The glowing aura that surrounds him. The sound of his laughter. All of these things are genuine. No traces of pretence nor lies.

He likes seeing this version of him but Zhan didn't mean that he didn't like Yibo now. He still does.

This Yibo, this is what he desires, he longs to see again. This is a dream and he knew that when he opens his eyes, none of these will he witnesses again. Them painting together while laughing. Him leaning against Yibo's shoulder as the man sings while they finish their painting. Hands holding paintbrushes, giving life to the white canvas, pouring all of their emotions along with the colors. He knew when he wakes up, all of these will disappear.

And he's right, right after opening his eyes, he went back to reality.

'Lovers? Don't fall deeper to it, Zhan. Wake up or you'll suffer more.'

He got up the bed and sighed. He went downstairs to cook for the two. Cooking a simple porridge and meat buns. He prepared milk for Hannah and black coffee for Yibo.

Then his cellphone rang. He groaned when he saw the caller's name.

Yubin.

"Hey darling. Guess what? I'm going to New York too. We'll meet there, meet me at the airport okay?"

Zhan bit his lips. Yubin sounded so enthusiastic and excited as well. He faked a cough twice.

"Darling, what's wrong Zhan?"

"I'm not in New York right now, Yubin. I'm back in Beijing."

He couldn't help but confess. If he didn't, Yubin will pester him until he  tells him the truth.

"Zhan."- he warned him. "You didn't, right? Tell me darling, you didn't right?"

Yubin sounded so desperate. He hates to make him worry but he already done that. He's here with the Wangs.

"They needs me, Yubin."

"They?"- Yubin raised his voice and became hysteric. "It's him. Am I correct?"- he demanded.

Zhan shook his head even though Yubin couldn't see him. He felt nervous. Yubin was such a cutie and  a sweetheart. He was the one who helped him when he was at his lowest. He's not just his friend but his brother too, a family.

"I have to do this, Yubin."- he reasoned.

"No Zhan! You don't have too! You know it!"

"I had to do it Yubin. Hannah's my child! Mine! I couldn't let her be. I couldn't....

Zhan loses his strength. His voice raised but also loses in the end, whispering as his knees wobbled.

"It hurts me because of what Elizabeth had done to me but I chose to let them go."- He sobbed and let his tears to flow.

It feels like his heart continues receiving heavy blows. Prick by thousand of needles.

He didn't complain when Yibo woke up one day and lost his memories.  He didn't know what happened but what Yibo knows, that Elizabeth is his girlfriend.

He couldn't tell them, him, that they were in a relationship before that incident. He didn't know that he was pregnant that time and by the time that he had given birth, he received a very bad news.