What if they hate me?

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This gif has absolutely nothing to do with this chapter but it just makes me feel some kind of way. Damn Hemmings.

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I slowly walked towards the open field. Calum stood in the middle of it, kicking at the ground. One hand in his pocket and one hand locked around a whiskey bottle. Holding on for dear life as if he'd die without it.

He didn't look angry, sad or anything really. He just looked empty, he looked numb. I wasn't so sure if it was because of the alcohol, but he looked vulnerable. No thick walls around him, just a lost boy.

I walked closer stepping on a twitched, which snapped helplessly under my feet. He turned around, straightening his posture. He walked towards me, slowing down a few meters in front of me.

'You think you're so smart, don't you Rosey Rose?' He started raising his voice. 'You think you've got it aaall figured out! But lemme tell you something, you do not. Cause I..' He slurred. 

Not being able to talk properly because of all the alcohol in his bloodstream. 'I forgot what I wanted to say.' he giggled, falling silent as he puts his hand on my cheek. I swapped his hand away with mine, just to be captured with his spare hand and pulling me closer.

'You look very beautiful, just like a real rose. I should buy you roses. Do you like roses? I mean you're name is Rose, so you kind of have to like them right? You don't need to, it's fine if you don't like them! You're lips have a rosy colour too. They look so soft. I want to kiss them, again. Properly now. Can I kiss them?' He looked at me with pleading eyes. This was just drunken rambling. None of it was true and he wouldn't remember what he had said later on. 

I shook my hand, gently pushing him away.  'No you won't let me because of Luke isn't that right? Mr Perfect blue eyes. Mr I made you a mixtape. Which was my idea by the way. Why does he get the chance to get to know you? Why don't I?'

I don't know what was going on but I didn't like it one bit. 'Calum, I never said I don't want to be friends. You were rude to me the second we met, that's on you Calum not on me.' I spat at him.

He looked down at his feet, kicking the ground once more before sitting on the ground with his head between his knees. 

'You hate me, don't you? I messed up big time didn't I? I just, when we met you didn't look at me like all the other girls do. You didn't introduce yourself. You didn't flirt with me, you didn't even get nervous. You were just standing up for yourself in the locker room and then I scared you.' he sighed.

'I didn't know what to do so I was a dick to you, on purpose. I went out of my way to talk to you, to hurt you. Just to see how you reacted. You're not scared of me are you?' he looked up at me with eyes full of terror awaiting my answer.

'Cal, you might be taller than me, have tattoos and can be a huge dick sometimes. But you never scared me. Intimidate, yes. Scared, no.' I shrugged. He looked up at me, pulling me down to the ground so I was on eye level with him. All he did was smile at me like a overly excited puppy. 

I gave him a questioning look to which he responded 'You just called me 'Cal'! Does that mean you forgive me, I want you to. To forgive me, I mean. We could be friends. I don't have many friends that are girls. None actually. Just my mum and sister really. I miss them.' 

Then it happened. A tear left Calum's eyes. He quickly swapped it away. 'Tell me, tell me about them.' I cautiously watched him as I slowly took his hand. Hoping he would let me in. 

It might be a bad thing to do, but I was absolutely taking advantage of the fact that Calum Hood was sitting next to me still drunk. He had been sobering up for a little, but he still wasn't able to speak without slurring or to keep his balance. Even while sitting. So he just laid down. 

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