Old habits die hard (boyxboy)

(6) Officially off

Deryk POV

Today was the big day, the momentous moment, the exhilarating game, or as whoever those who actually cared wanted to call it. I frankly, did not belong in that group. However I did involve myself with those curious about how the rugby team will conduct themselves after losing a star player.

As we situated ourselves on the shabby seating around the historically untouched pitch, our college team stretched upon the familiar grounds of our town. The opposing team came from a private high school, filled with students specialised and trained since birth to excell in fitness. Greatly unlike our own pupils. Having requested to go against a skilled elder team in preparation for one of their own more serious tournaments, our college readily jumped at the opportunity for more practice and hopefully victories. They were warming up in their own territory for now, agreeing to arrive at this pitch for 4:50pm to begin at 5pm.

Yet the only issue is, as i've said, one of the best isn't currently here. To be truthful, for a character like me who is purely here to see the chaos ensued from needing to replace an exiled member with a below average one, that should be great. But the fact that it's Kellan whose currently absent from the pitch, yeah that's not so great. Not to me at least. Granted, not because I care about him nor want to see him play (obviously), more so because of his words that loomed hauntingly over my head. He's weak, hey don't put that on me he said it himself!

The clock was ticking ever closer, standing at the base of the seats an announcer proclaimed the arrival of our opponents and official 10 minute countdown. Yet Kellan was nowhere in sight. Had they done something to him? Said something? I had no idea, it's not like I have (nor want) the means to check up on him, though I can't help but worry. He wasn't a bad person, not truly, so its perfectly reasonable to worry about one of the few in a group of thirteen that aren't discrimanatory to those I care about. Also, his admittince to the authorities caused my whole perspective to shift. Not change, just shift. I still dislike him and still believe he deserves to be disliked, yet his display suggested he's not entirely to blame for being led astray. Proving my point even more, knowing him he wouldn't blame others for his unrespectable actions but instead take full responsibility. Now a wholeheartedly wicked soul wouldn't do that.

My friends were mumbling gossip beside me by the sounds of it, exchanging bets on victories if I had to guess. I hadn't planned to go with Mark and Ash since I don't tend to socialise beyond school hours, but it turns out the two cousins share an interest in sports so invited me along when Ash came across us in the library. That, and we were all mutually captivated by the rumours of someone being kicked off the team. What? We all need a little gossip sometimes!

"Hey either of you two want a drink of anything, need to stretch my legs ima grab myself a water."
I interrupted promptly, becoming quickly antsy as the rundown digital clock near the stalls ticked again.
"Unless there's beers then I'm good thanks! You know I can't pass up a beer though."
Ash spoke jokingly, their neutral voice filled with excitement for the game. Apparently they were one of those who swung between countless clubs in highschool, never finding one that felt quite right so opting for the exact opposite in college. To be fair, their ever changing hairstyles reflect that personality aspect immaculately (it being a longer red buzz cut currently).

Wandering down to the few stalls available, I couldn't help but keep a good eye out for Kellan. It was instinctual at this point, I don't understand why but i'll admit my mind raced somewhat faster than normal with concern as to what could have happened. This is so annoying, irritating that I subconsciously still hold them and their safety close to my heart and my eyes involuntarily search for their presence when he's supposed to be here. I'm sick of it. He hasn't been there for me since five years ago, there's no point holding onto something absent and I know that. But with our conversation came avoidance, on his behalf, and it's only worsened my worry.