12 - Poem

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How did we go from an accidental encounter at a hotel bar to me never wanting to return to my regular life? Normally, one week of solitude in the cabin is more than enough to recharge my batteries

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How did we go from an accidental encounter at a hotel bar to me never wanting to return to my regular life? Normally, one week of solitude in the cabin is more than enough to recharge my batteries. Yet this time, I want to stay here for the rest of forever.

Something changed in me, like a switch flipped in my brain. Suddenly, I don't want the things I wanted before. What's fame and recognition if you go back to an empty apartment? What's sex for if it's just a quick satisfaction? Can we just stay here, maintain this place, live with nature, maybe get a remote job and plant something in the backyard? What did this guy do to me?

Right now, we face each other in bed, one arm tucked under the pillow, and we talk about small things. The soft light lets me see his face, and his eyes look heavy. I can tell he'll be the first one to fall asleep. But before he does, I'll try to learn as much as I can. I want to know who he really is, where he lives, and who his friends are.

- So... umm... where did you grow up?

- In the city, in a high-rise building on the 27th floor. This is my first time staying in a forest.

- Yeah... I kind of figured that out when I saw your "hiking sneakers".

- My sneakers are just fine. That hill needs to be leveled a bit.

- Totally, it's all the hill's fault. Next time we'll get you nice hiking boots.

- Next time? My legs need at least a day's break. What are you made of, Chan?

- Ah, you can do it. My dad goes hiking each weekend. And when we get to the top, you can take photos or draw.

- Yeah, that was really cool. I want to do that again.

- How did you get into drawing?

- I went to art college because I got the scholarship. Still, the scholarship wasn't enough to cover my expenses. I had to work too. You know how it goes, I couldn't attend classes all day and work all night. One night I just collapsed at work and ended up in the hospital. I had to quit my studies.

- Oh, that must have been hard.

- It's fine. That's life. I quit after two years, then I took some free online classes and learned animation. Now I work as a freelancer, animation designer, character creator... whatever pays the bills.

- Your drawings are amazing. Unique, kind of emotional, expressive...

- Thanks. That's how I got into tattooing too. I create original art when people tell me what they want. Although, people usually don't know what they want. They prefer you tell them what they want.

- I love my tattoos although I have to cover them up each day on set.

- Can you tell me why you don't want to watch your movies with me?

- Ahhh... watching myself on screen makes me cringe. When filming is done, I'm just done with that movie and I move on to another one. I get invited to premiere screening, but I only show up on the red carpet, and then sneak out.

- You sneak out with the lead role actress or actor, don't you?

- No. I leave alone.

- Oh come on, you can tell me.

- No, really. I don't do that. I know actors who hook up on a movie set. But they only do it once. After that, they don't get invited back for a next movie. Directors hate dealing with actors' personal drama.

- But how can you not fall for all those gorgeous people you work with?

- I'm not interested in them.
I like you. You are my ideal type.

- I like you too. - he says quietly. It's so soft, almost like he's confessing a mortal sin. I see him gulp and bite his nails again.

- Are you nervous? You said you were nervous when you bite nails.

- No, no. I just remembered we're leaving in three days. That's all.

- You know, Hyunjin, this doesn't have to end.

- What do you mean?

- I want to stay in touch with you. You can come visit me. We can... you know, if you want... we could date.

- Chan... we said it would be just one week and then we go our separate ways. You have your life, I have mine. We don't even live in the same town.

- You said that, not me. Sometimes, people change their mind.

- I'm not what you think I am. I'm not your kind.

- How do you know what's my kind, mhm?

He smiles mysteriously, beautifully.

- I know I'm not like you. You need someone who is just like you. Famous, sophisticated, rich...

- I feel bad for you, Hyun. You'll fall so hard when you change your mind about me.

- Oh is that so?

- Yes. You'll see we're good together, and you'll miss me terribly.

- Chan, how to say this... I don't want you to end up hating me when things go bad. Let's just enjoy what we have now with no pressure.

- Your word is my command, Hyun.

I turn off the mood light and darkness floods over the whole room. He snuggles into my chest, it feels natural to be connected like that. There is no more 'Hyunjin and Chan' in that bed. Just two warm bodies, fitting perfectly like pieces of a broken sculpture. We're one.

- Chan...

- Yeah?

- Talk to me, will you? Anything, really. I like your voice. It helps me relax and shush all the thoughts in my mind.

- I'll tell you a poem, how about that?
When I was a first-year student, I wrote a poem. I thought it was the best poem ever, but the professor failed me. It broke my heart. Then, Changbin took those lyrics and turned them into a song, he even got an award later for the magic he did producing it. Now, for the professor, I wrote another poem, it was more of the kind she wanted to see, but—

Soft, sweet snores are heard before I even start my poem.

- Goodnight, city boy. Dream of me tonight.

*****

This chapter was written before
'I like it' but it somehow fits the story, don't you think?

Yeah I love that I like you
but I don't wanna love.
🎶

*****

Too sweet for me / Hyunchan /Where stories live. Discover now