Bambina - secrets revealed

16. Dress

I walk to daddy's car. He's climbing out, greeting me like the badass gentleman he is. "Hi, baby," he says, opening the car door for me, while leaning in for a kiss. His cologne wraps around me like a familiar blanket, a scent I've always associated with safety and strength. Citrus and musk... home. 

"Hi," I reply softly, slipping into the passenger seat. The leather creaks as I settle in, the car's interior a fortress of luxury and power. Just like him. He buckles me in, kissing me once again before closing the door. His sugary lips, tastes sweeter than honey.

As he slides into the driver's seat, he turns slightly to face me, his eyes, fiery hazel meets mine. "How did it go?" 

"Fine. Normal. Except for... well, Danielle..." I explain, breathing in. 

He listens, his fingers tapping a thoughtful rhythm on the steering wheel. "You talked about her?"

I nod, "yeah. Kinda hard not to."

"What did you guys talk about then?" 

"Nothing... but there are some rumors." 

"Rumors?" He asks, a sheer surprise layered within his voice. 

I nod as he takes a turn to the left. "According to Hailee... people are saying you slept with her, and that uh, that's the reason she 'killed' herself."

Daddy laughs loudly. And I wanna join him, because it is ridiculous. But someone's death is not. I doesn't feel right. 

"That's crazy," he says through laughs. All I can seem to do is nod in agreement. Because it is ridiculous. 

But knowing what I know about how she felt, all it does is sadden me. 

"What's wrong?" He asks once his laughs calm down. 

I shrug, "m-maybe it would've... been better, if you... you know." 

He shakes his head. "No. You don't even get to say that. I would never cheat on you. Firstly because I don't want to. I only want you. Secondly, because you don't deserve hell just to spare someone else hell. We're not going back there. Say you're sorry. Not to me but to yourself." 

I sigh. "It's just... she could've been... she would've never..." I say, choking, tears pouring. 

We reach a crossroads, stopping for the pedestrians. "We can't know that, baby. And you can't save everyone. Though I know that's what you want, it's simply impossible." 

Daddy looks at me, his thumb drying away a few tears before he has to drive again. "It's not your fault, bambina." 

The road ahead twists and turns, leading us deeper into the countryside. 

Daddy's words hang in the air, heavy yet comforting, as if they are trying to shield me from my own thoughts.

"I just can't shake the feeling that I could have done something," I whisper, my voice barely audible over the hum of the engine.

Daddy reaches over, his hand finding mine, warm and steady. "Her struggles are not a reflection of you. She may have written her diary in a way that makes you feel like it's your fault, but it's not. People are responsible for their own issues. Envy is not to blame on the one who is envied. It's the other way around. Envy is a wicked sin, bambina. It was her fault. She was sick."

I nod, trying to let his words seep into my consciousness, to replace the guilt and sadness that has taken root there. The countryside around us is serene. Can't believe we live in the outskirts of the city now. Somewhere less chaotic, more calm and grounding. Somewhere I can breathe air that's fresher and cleaner. Fields stretch out endlessly, the green of the grass blending with the blue of the sky at the horizon. It's peaceful here, a place where time seems to slow down, where the weight of the world feels a little lighter.