As much as I think finally going on a date after Joe is a great idea, I also feel as if it is too soon. For example, is he going to read about me going on this date, if he does will it upset him? I wanted to say no to this idea but at the same time I fear I can't say no to Dua. She's just so amazing to say no to, if that makes sense.
A knock on my door wakes me from my thoughts. It's definitely Travis. I open the door and yep there he is, the most handsome football player. Why can't I see him the way I should yet? Lover Taylor would be going crazy for this man but I can't see him like that, not how I'm seeing Dua I fear.
"Hey what's up!" He says as he spread his big arms for me to hug him and I do. Hoping there's some sort of cable that I can connect to so I can feel what he's feeling.
"Hi" I shyly reply
"You look so beautiful like always" he says and I know I do but it's so great to hear it. I'm sure he's exploding with happiness to see me.
"Thank you, you look very handsome" I say and it's true he does. Not sure if I mean it as I should.
"Should we get going then?" He says reaching his hand out for me to hold. I nod and take his hand.
Quickly I begin to compare. It's mean I know but can you blame me? His hands feel more rough, not really soft at all, not like Joe's. They're way bigger than his too, it's sort of nice.
We finally arrive to the car. He opens the door for me, simple things like this are something I'm used to but it always feels different with different people. You can tell when someone truly wants to do it versus when someone does it to impress you. Travis feels like he's done it before and he knows it's the correct thing to do. He's a big man but a very respectful one so far.
"Last night's show was really amazing to watch, you're really killing it every night" he says
"More like it's killing me" I laugh and he laughs as well
"I need to go see you play, if you ever invite me" I tease
"You're invited to every game from now on then, I'll save you a seat for each one even if you don't show" he says
"You're so sweet I'll definitely make it out there, maybe I'll surprise you like you did to me" I say
It's true, he's so sweet for saying that.
"I hope you didn't mind me surprising you, I just couldn't last another day with only texts and calls" he says
"Course I didn't mind it, it's such a brave cute gesture" I say and I quickly see him turn red. I miss that red shade on faces. I haven't been able to feel it myself yet for anyone but Dua.
"I'm really happy this date is happening, I'm nervous about it so I'm happy your friends are coming with" he says
"Yea it's a perfect set up right? Don't be nervous though I'm not a some scary person you need to impress, be yourself" I say
More than a perfect set up it is. I'm trying to stop my thoughts from thinking that in some twisted way this is a date for me and Dua. It's horrible I know but I can't stop thinking about her the more I try the farther I am to succeeding.
We finally arrive. He again opens the door for me, some part of me feels so satisfied that I attracted someone so respectful. I feel so close to him already it's weird.
I want to sprint to find Dua but I can't. As I walk out the car I feel the flashes on me. Hitting me almost feeling like mosquitos sucking on me but to get every detail out of my life from me. I already know what the tabloids will say tomorrow but I don't care. I need to stop caring at some point.
