Forgotten Lover (parentlock/johnlock)

Part 12

Hamish POV
I woke up the next morning, not really feeling anything. I'd had a dream, about dad being taken away from me, and I always felt guilty because we never sorted it out. He was sat in his chair asleep. I kicked his foot as I went past and sat in Sherlocks chair, opposite him. He woke up, and jumped back when he saw me.
J- am I dreaming?
H- no, it's me
He looked at me in disbelief. We were silent for a few moments and then a door opening broke the silence. Sherlock walked out his room, rubbed his eyes and looked at us both, stopped and turned back into his room. I turned to face dad again, his eyes hadn't left mine.
H- dad, I'm sorry-
J- no Hamish I'm sorry, I was said something so hurtful to you that I should of never said. You always made me happy Hamish, when you were lying in my arms, not breathing, I held you in my arms and cried, and then I heard you screaming and, I stopped breathing, I was so happy. Being the first one to hold you, being the one that I saw you kicking in the cot first. I watched you as you took your first steps and your first word was dadda. I can remember waking up and you had two teeth growing through your gums and you gave me this cheeky grin and then bit my finger straight afterwards
He was looking at the floor smiling.
J- you didn't always take my mind off Sherlock, I was always thinking about him, but you made me into a better person, you made me realise that I needed to get over him, it had been years since he'd... supposedly gone. You definitely kept me busy, you coloured all over the walls with felt tips that were supposedly washable. Your mum still didn't find out until a few weeks after and I got the blame, so thanks for that Hamish, anyway, here-
He handed me a black notebook and smiled.
J- I kept this 'diary' until you were 7. You might not like a few things in there but I just thought I'd show you how much you did mean to me. I do love you Hamish, more than you could ever know
I took the diary from him and nodded my head.
H- thank you
J- what for?
H- for apologising, I know how stubborn you are-
J- hey!
We heard a bang from inside Sherlocks bedroom.
S- I'M FINE
J- no you're not
He got up from his chair and walked into Sherlocks bedroom. I heard quite mumbling when I walked past the door, I don't even want to know what they were up to. I sat on my bed and opened the notebook.

July 25th
I bought this notebook today from the hospital giftshop, I don't know why they sell notebooks at a giftshop, hey! You've just had a baby, here's a notebook and a brand new pen! Hey! You're on your deathbed, heres a notebook, and guess what I got you to go with it, a brand new pen! I'm sat in the room with my newborn son, Hamish Sherlock Watson. Strong. One word to describe him, just like his daddy as Mary said. I'm not strong, locking myself in my apartment for ages, that's not strong. I was pathetic, and I don't want my son to be anything like me when he grows up.

I put the book down and ran downstairs, nearly knocking Sherlock over. I wrapped my arms around dads neck, he was facing away from me as he was sat in his chair.
J- Hamish what are you doing?
H- I hope I am like you when I'm older
J- what?
H- I've started reading your notebook, I hope I am like every bit of you when I'm older, loyal, kind and funny, brave. I really do hope I am like you.
I looked at his face, he had a tear in his eye. Sherlock coughed awkwardly and I stood up. Dad rubbed my arms and I went back upstairs. I read a few more pages in the notebook, it did prove that I made dad just the slightest bit more happy, but reading even the first pages, how sad he was that Sherlock had gone. I knew he was sad, I grew up with him, but reading how he'd wrote it down, how this was actually how he felt, it made me a bit emotional. It also made me hate Sherlock even more. There was a knock on the door and Sherlock walked in, just what I needed.
S- we're going out, look for more clues on the case, do you want to come?
I sat there in silence for a few seconds.
H- do you know how you made my dad feel? When you faked your death. I've just read a full page on how he felt like he was going to kill himself, he knew how easy it was to do it, he was thinking about it Sherlock, even after he had me, he would of killed himself and left his son with no father, when you would of returned years later alive, more alive than ever
He was looking at the floor, tears filled his eyes.
S- I would of stopped him
H- how, you wouldn't of blown your precious cover, you wouldn't of wasted all that time to stop him from doing what you did
S- I know Hamish, I know! You don't understand! I had to do it, to destroy Moriartys web! If I hadn't, he would of died anyway, so would Lestrade and Mrs Hudson and Molly-
J- why's everyone shouting?
Sherlock looked at him and back to me, turning his head to the floor.
J- is anyone going to answer me?
H- who's shouting now?
He opened his mouth to speak again, but nothing came out.
J- are you coming or not Hamish?
H- not if he's there
J- Hamish! Sherlock is letting you stay here because you don't want to go home, have some manners!
H- not after what he did to you
J- why the sudden change of attitude? Hamish-
S- it's fine John leave it, if he doesn't want to go, then lets go, we have a criminal to catch, although we could of really done with Hamish to lure Nurse Zachary into our trap-
H- what did he do?
S- we think we found our match
H- but-
S- no buts, come on, we've got a killer to catch
I jumped off my bed and ran out of the door, following dad and Sherlock.