Not done DRAFT

Chapter 5

After she got my stuff unpacked, she went outside and had a smoke what she did not see coming was for Jake to fallow her. She lit it and took a puff she saw Jake sitting watching her seeing the look on his face.

" What Jake, I can feel you watching me."   

" How long has this been going on."

" What's been going on?"

" The smoking you never used to smoke."

" I did you just never saw it I quit before the accident I got back into it two years ago." 

" Why did you get back into it."

" It's silly I felt bad after we broke up, I couldn't give you the help you needed." 

" We are together now you should quit it's not good for you."

She just smirked and took a puff he looks at her with pure worry his girl the love of his life was in pain. The cigarette he just wanted to throw it away, but he knew how that would go it was not the way. they headed back inside she put the cigarette out, but little did she know that was not the end it of Jake sat her on the bed.   

He held a cigarette out in front of him. " Get rid of this shit." His tone almost mad.

Molly took it from him. " You think your funny it's not that easy."

" No, I don't think it's funny it could hurt you do you even know what's in that?" 

" Look I ship out in two weeks I'm probably dead anyway." 

 He moves pining her on the bed " You're not going to die we can have a life together you and me."

" We can't have a life when I'm shipped out miles away."

" Then stay here and we can."

" Do you know how much of a better life we can have if I do this you won't have to live off monthly health payments."   

He nuzzles his face into her neck. " I don't want a better life I want to be with you."

" I do to I know but-"

" Please baby I can't lose you not again." 

" God two years without me was that bad huh?"

" Ah huh" he says in a baby voice.

She giggles. " Your too cute. Damit I can't play with your hair anymore you shaved it."

" Sucker."

She glares at him. " Rude."

" I'm growing it out again don't worry."

" You better be!"

 That night they slept holding ech other the best sleep they have had in two years They were woken up by sunlight in the window. She hated that in the morning turning to face Jake cuddling into his chest taking in his sent. Then she felt a hand cupping the back of her head Jake's soft lips kissing her forehead, he smiled at her. She smiled into his chest he chuckles hugging and holding her close.

" Baby good morning."

" Morning Jakey."   

They got up Jake went to make coffee while Molly went to have a smoke, they got sidetracked last night and didn't finish their conversation. Jake still wanted to talk to her about it he didn't want it to hurt her in the long run even if she didn't see it now. He would talk about it over breakfast and coffee she loved coffee hopefully she still likes it the same. They would always joke because Molly liked her coffee sweet and Jake liked his coffee black. She went back inside to see that Jake made breakfast and coffee for her.        

" Aw thanks baby."

" Yeah, come sit I need to talk to you about something I'm guessing you still like your coffee the same."

" Yeah, you still like it nasty and black?" She smiled sitting across from him. 

" I like what I like."

" So, what is this about?"

" Baby I care about you and I'm worried about you I know smoking is an addiction, but it is going to hurt you in the long run."

" I can't quit trust me I've tried."

" Trust me I know; for my drinking it took me years and even now I still feel a craving every once in a while."     

She stabs her fork into her egg's tears in her eyes seeing that he knows it's not just about his spine but something more than that. But he doesn't know what it could be or how to ask without hurting her.

" What is it, Babygirl?"

  " You didn't see how much blood you lost that day I got PTSD from that I'd dream about it and wake up screaming I couldn't get it out of my head."

" Why didn't you tell me I would've helped."

" We are soldiers we learn to hide emotion and how was I going to tell you. Hey, you just broke your spine and just so you know I'm having nightmares about something I got us into."    

" You have to stop blaming yourself."

" Then who if I wasn't there you wouldn't have had to go back for me."

" No one not me not you but you smoking isn't going to help."

He rolled over to her trying to make her see this was not on her, placing his forehead on hers, her fighting tears. She knows deep down it was not her fault, but she couldn't stop feeling like it was that thought would not leave her head. She moved her head onto his shoulder his chin on her head he knew this would take time he was willing to wait.