Letters to God

Letter #3

I hope this letter finds you well,

I want you to know that I don't harbor any resentment towards you at all. After-all who could hate anything they truly love? I want you to know that I tried. I tried for a long time to bring you back. I don't think I ever tried for anything this hard in my life before.
But the sad truth is that you have hurt me. Like a sad song on repeat we kept playing the same tune over and over which ended with my heart broken even more and me missing you.
As of right now you are not feeling any of this pain. You are lucky enough to be an avoidant attachment and you can go months without feeling the pain of this relationship. Where I'm an anxious attachment and I go months immediately feeling the loss of your love.
Sadly, you have kept yourself distracted to the point you haven't had to deal with anything. But the fact is your hurt is coming while mine is getting better.
You will miss me and you will want me back at some point. You'll quickly realize all the things you've said to me, all the times I tried to get you back only for you to cast me away as if I was disposable. Those words will come back to haunt you at some point. Most likely when you are completely alone and no longer have the distractions of the affair. Let's be honest, that relationship doesn't have much time left. It's taking its last breaths as it sinks deep into a pit of disparity.
But by then I'll be healed from your abandonment of my love. I'll be healed and more secure in who I am and what I want out of life. The question becomes will I then want you? You see a huge percentage of long relationships that has a partner that leaves tend to always  return. So I know you'll be returning one day. I had hoped it would be because you actually chose me but it's looking more and more as if you will return after this affair has ended and you are left with yourself and your thoughts.
You see that's unfortunately when god is going to start doing his work on you. You're going to break, you will probably loose everything, and you will have nowhere to turn but to me. Because that how god works. He has a sense of humor like that with a bit of vindication for my part.
But then the choice is mine. Will I want to help you or let you set on your grief? I guess only time will tell.

Good luck