"He deserved more than that. More than a chapter, more than entire epics, he deserved to live, the Fields of Asphodel will never deserve someone as devoted and good as him. He lived for justice, he died for justice, but I would throw that justice at...
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Yeah, I'm Sorta Angry
╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮
Our walk was very silent, in a very awkward way. So I simply told him to ask me questions. Because, I don't know, maybe it'd do me good to try and organize my thoughts? Well, his first question was on the curse. I'd shrugged and phrased it as simply as I could.
"Eros is the patron of the Nakamura bloodline. One of my godforsaken fucking ancestors decided to fall in love with him. Eros was in his loyal phase though, or whatever. He wouldn't touch her, and just pitied her or some shit. And he made it so that she could have anyone else she wanted. But overall, it's just a stupid curse that makes stupid and pretty faces like you want to fuck me."
"I'm sorry." he muttered shamefully, as if it would change anything. "And Ethan... Gods, it was wrong. I'm sorry."
My response was bitter, barely bothering to even turn my eyes to his.
"Being sorry won't bring him back."
"You went through a lot together... Why were you both so loyal to the Army?" he asked, as we kept on walking forward to nowhere in particular. "And your recruitment..."
"They only resorted to that method a couple of times. Luke really wanted my brother and me... For some reason. He excused himself with some prophecy that had a half-clear line about revenge, but I figure there was more to it." I shrugged, remembering the words of the dead boy I'd called friend. "Luke protected us. The Army was like family, honestly. I mean, I was nine when my father died. Ethan was ten, and we were orphaned. We had no one but each other, until Luke reached out to us. The Army defended us, and so we defended the Army."
Until we didn't, I thought, but kept it to myself.
He stopped walking, forcing me to look back and meet his eyes. They were... sorrowful. He was apologetic, and there was something in his tone that sounded like he yearned for my forgiveness, even though we both knew, deep down, that it wasn't his fault.
"Erica, I'm sorry." he implored miserably. His voice almost shivered, sincere and mourning. "We failed you. We failed the demigods that needed our protection. We failed you, and Ethan, and Alabaster, and Luke, and all the kids I'll never be able to name."
The boy looked like he was about to kneel at my feet and beg for forgiveness. Silently, I thought about the gods, who'd never done anything like it. Nemesis had not apologized after stealing our lives from us, she hadn't showed any remorse for leading Ethan to his death. My dreams, none of them had been of her. But his apology seemed so... heartfelt.
Enough to touch me.
"You all deserved better." he gazed into me apologetically, and for a minute I thought my eyes might water. "We should've done better. You didn't deserve to go through that."
