The Edge of Society

The beginning

My life is a living hell, everything fell apart just like that. As I came home one day from school I walked into the small house that I call home, the house that's been through snow, storms, hail everything.

Due to my parents being assholes and abusive it threw me off my a and b honor roll, therefore losing my scholarship and I needed that, knowing nobody was going to pay for my college fees.

Kinda wish I was as strong as that house I spoke under my breath I a small whisper As I walked into the place I called home the smell of unease filled the air, filling it with its thick mucky scent, along with the sound of crying.

I walked into the living room and froze when I saw my older cousin crying over my dead mom and dad, both having a bullet imprinted in their skull... I had a.. weird feeling, it wasn't unease nor the feeling you feel when you do something wrong.. it's hard to explain but it sat In my stomach I didn't like them anyway.. they were both assholes of parents.

My cousin must've heard me walking inside the home, and he turned to face me with teary eyes and flushed red cheeks, and as soon as he seen me, the look of grief left his eyes and now was replaced by hatred, he got up and grabbed me by my collar of my school uniform.

"Y..You should've died..."

He said, funny how three little words can make an impact, you could say it was a trauma response... but I knew, they all wanted me dead.

At that moment I couldn't do anything, cry, push him off nothing, only sit there as he hid his sadness with the anger he had for me. I could hear the ambulance coming, and his older cousin put him down and looked at him with a cold pained look

"G..Get out, go, Go kill yourself for all I care!"

He yelled at me, his tone was full of anger, pain, sadness, it makes sense he'd take it all out on me, that's what everyone else does. But then again at that moment, I couldn't move, even when the paramedics pushed in and declared my mom and dad...

Dead.

The house was full of people marking the crime scene, and wrapping up his parent's bodies. Moving around looking around asking questions, and there I was, frozen in place. One of the paramedics walked up to me, leaning down to my level, a lady with gold locks and beautiful skin that went with her brown eyes.

"Are you ok, hunny?"

The lady asked in a very soft voice, watching me, treating me as if I was some cute dog in the pet store, I happened to look beside her and saw my cousin on the phone, probably telling the family that it was all my fault. He looked over at me with a different look, as if..pity?

As if saying to me, you know this is your fault. What did I do wrong to these people? Merely existing, who knew that the next step you would take in life you'd end up finding your parents dead on the ground. I should've died? What did I do wrong? It's like once someone paints you the bad guy, then you will stay the bad guy.

...And without saying anything to the paramedic who was still waiting for an answer..

I ran...